The Test of Time

57 ~ March

"So how do you think it went?" I pester and hear my sister sigh at the other end of the phone. I find it so hard at college, not waking up to her annoying face every day, not frustrating her by tidying the apartment around her. I dread to think how messy it is now, having given it a thorough spring clean during my last visit the weekend after my relationship crumbled.

"I'm not sure, I have to wait and see."

"Els, you've already got more experience with nursing anyway. I'm sure the interview went better than you think."

"I hope so." She mutters, "How are you?"

"Fine."

"No really Ann." She contends, "You broke up with your boyfriend of eleven months four weeks ago. How are you?"

"It's getting easier." I admit, dropping my pencil down on the paper as I glance across at the endless rows of bookshelves. I don't feel guilty for being on my phone in the library, as if anyone else would be here at half nine on Saturday morning. The only reason I am is because my next paper is due on Wednesday and I have a grand total of five words. "I'm not staying in bed all day anymore, if that's what you mean." I add, slightly quieter as the stern looking librarian glances over at me.

"And Brett? Have you seen him?" She asks.

"I saw him at a party." I mutter, startled at the mention of his name from my grudge-bearing sister. "I don't know what you're getting at."

"Anna, from what you've told me it seems you can't stay away from him." She retorts.

"Yes I can." I hiss back down the phone.

"Sure." She snorts and I can almost hear her eyes roll from down the phone. "Anna, why aren't you chasing after Haydon?"

"What?" I splutter. Excuse me?

"Why aren't you begging him to forgive you?" She continues and I feel a slight defensive rage rise within me.

"He left me. He made up his mind about me and he left." I snap, "Why should I?"

"You loved him." She agrees, "But you weren't in love with him."

"Elle..."

"Ann you wear your heart on your sleeve. I know you, and I know that if you were truly happy you would be desperate to cling onto your relationship, to try and make it right." She lectures and I swallow the lump in my throat, her words hitting me hard. I hate that my sister knows me so well that she can point out exactly how I feel without me even realising it myself.

"Okay, so maybe Haydon and I weren't meant to be..." I admit before trailing off, "That doesn't mean I like Brett." I argue, "I can be an independent woman."

"You can be in a relationship and still be independent." Elle laughs.

"I don't want to be in a relationship." I scoff, shaking my head as I pick the pencil back up and begin to scrawl across the page. I think I've had my fair share of relationship hell. I might become a Nun.

"Do whatever will make you happy." My sister exclaims.

"Food makes me happy." I point out, "I'm going to order a huge takeaway tonight and watch Bad Moms." I grin, "It's going make me very happy."

"Have fun." Elle laughs.

"I will." I assure her, "See ya!" I quickly hang up, smiling down at the phone. God, I really do miss Elle.

Placing my phone down on the desk beside me I bite my lip as I look back at the paper, desperate to wipe any thoughts of Haydon or Brett from my mind so that I can finish this in time for the deadline.