Defending Heart

Chapter 19: Forgiveness and Irrationality

James catches Severus leaving his potions classroom. His secret corridor no longer secret, Severus takes a painfully long time to pack up his things after the lesson ends so everyne else filters out before he does. It's a less effective method of avoiding people but he's been forced to resort to this. James waits outside for him, walking alongside him as they descend to the lower classrooms. "What do you want, Potter?" Severus sneers, speeding up. James' scar is evident as his bruises have faded to a yellowish-brown over the past few days. 

"Listen, I wanted to ask a question about the sensory potion I brewed - from that book. Will it affect my Muggle ADHD meds?" sincere concern is laced in his voice. Severus notices James moving more slowly than he remembers. Talking slower and quieter, arms dangling by his sides instead of fidgeting with his robe or tie. His eye movements are no longer rapid and flitting and they stare strsight ahead, unblinkingly. James is a stag, isn't he? Severus rememebers. The potions they took must be calming his alertness and alleviating his heightened hearing. He isn't as distracted from the conversation as he usually is. 

"They shouldn't, no," Severus frowns in thought. "But it's early to be sure. Have you experienced any ill-effects?" 

"No - the potion worked straight away and I've taken my meds already," 

"Just continue to monitor it then," Severus advises curtly. "If you'll excuse me," 

He steals down a darkened staircase to escape James - a small spiral one that leads only to the broomcupboard and a dead-end resting spot. One so insignificant it doesn't have to change places. Sitting in the catacomb below he wonders in shock how James can be so familiar with him, acting like nothing happened. Lily has been coldly ignoring him since the incident, going as far as to switch partners in Advanced Potions. 

Similarly, Harry has been nothing short of an emotional rollercoaster, still piecing each fragment together in his mind and trying to accept what happened. The nature of greyscale is without a fixed position but acceptance of somewhere in between. It's not that Harry isn't handling it well. Harry isn't handling it at all - for someone with such a malleable personality he has a rigidify fixed mindset. Wherever James got his nonchalance from, it wasn't from his father.  

Harry is waiting by the door to the Great Hall at dinner. All around him students crowd around the doorway, entering in droves. Many give him high-fives and praise his fame, he can tolerate it while distractedly searching for Severus. Height and jet black hair towering above the heads of the rest means Harry picks Severus out easily, gripping his hand and dragging him from the crowd. 

"Where are we going?" Severus asks and Harry releases him just a few feet from the door and lines of students. Some look over, staring curiously at Harry. 

"Do you want to have dinner with me instead?" he asks, voice a low murmur. 

There isn't a question, of course he does. Severus doesn't even have to answer, simply follows Harry upstairs to the well-lit but empty staffroom. There's a mix of older traditional elements of Hogwarts, like the major furniture and most functional objects of modern convenience, like the kettle and coffee machine - both of which are operated by magic even if there's a plug socket right there. There's a small stove wedged between cupboards against the wall, so small you can't see it from most angles. Harry ignites a fire in its hearth and transfigures a small selection of things they're serving in the Great Hall onto the kitchen counter. A wide variety - they're spoiled for choice but both go for options more suited to breakfast than dinner: pancakes and syrup. 

Severus sits on one of the low couches and Harry opposite. Looking at him is easier than it was before. He no longer carries Hellish judgement is vicious as before. he just drapes his arms over the back of the couch and looks around with mild interest.