The cupcake guy

Chapter 16 - You can't run away

"Knot don't joke ! Please tell me the truth ! Last night in this nightclub... what did I do ?!"

When Knot saw his friend completely panic-stricken, he rolled his eyes and sighed. He had an headache and Arthit didn't make things better by bawling like that. He was so in panic that he almost hit his head against a wall when he came into the living room.

"Arthit ! Calm down !" Knot exclaimed, massaging his temples. "You make me feel giddy..."

"Knot... Tell me, please ! What did I do last night ?"

"Oh, wait ! Let me take my crystal ball and I'll tell you that !" He said ironically. "Good Lord Arthit... I have no idea what you're talking about ! You did a lot of things last night, if you want to know. But the one who should be asking you is me !" He made a slightly disappointed pout, looking his friend in the eye. "I thought Prem and I were your best friends... why didn't you tell us ? We never had a problem with Tutah, so why ?"

Arthit blinked, confused.

"Tell you what ?"

"You're attracted to men, aren't you ?"

Knot's voice resounded in Arthit's head like an echo that didn't end. He remained motionless for a while, not knowing what to say. Obviously, his friends had seen him dancing with this guy... and perhaps also... No... The rest was just a dream... It could only be a dream...

He mumbled nervously.

"What makes you say that ?"

"Ah no ! It's up to you to explain ! Come on, sit down. We really have to talk."

Indeed, it had been a while since Knot and Prem had noticed Arthit's strange behavior. He often seemed sad or so in the moon that he did not listen to what they were telling him. For Prem and Knot, it was clear that their friend had been hiding something since he started living in John's apartment. They didn't know if everything was connected, but they decided last night, seeing him drink so much, that it was time for them to find out what was going on.

They knew that the young man often withdrew into himself when something was bothering him or when he was having problems. Knot remembered very well the high school time, after the accident in which Arthit's parents had died, how their friend had changed. He had hunched in his shell. He had lost his spontaneity and his daring. Part of him, the one that shone so brightly, had vanished, as if he had lost the right to exist.

Knot and Prem hoped that one day, Arthit would be able to back on his feet again, overcome his fears and become the charismatic, radiant, confident boy he was before. But that would not happen if he continued to hold his emotions and flee his problems. Knot forced his friend to sit on the sofa in front of him.

"Come on, explain everything to me ! This guy you were dancing with... did you know him ? Is there something between you two ?"

Immediately, Arthit shook his head with a sigh.

"No, I don't know him... I just wanted to have a little fun... I wanted to dance with someone, to flirt... to forget..." He looked back at his friend. He had so much to say that he didn't know where to start. "I don't recognize myself... but last night, I really wanted to forget everything... I don't know if I love men... I only know that all this is because of him... He's the one who makes me act like this... Since I have known him, he's taking more and more place in my life... I realized that I loved him, I can't go against my feelings... I think about him constantly and..."

Knot stopped him with a firm hand on his shoulder.

"Wait ! Tell me first who you are talking about ! Who are you in love with ? Do I know him ?"