Hope is a Dangerous Thing [EDITING]

Chapter Thirty

"Fuck!" I screamed as I opened my eyes and looked around me as I tried to figure out where the hell I was and what the hell was going on with me. Air entered my lungs as I took a deep gasp of air as I looked into Cas' eyes, locking eyes with him.

    "What a great way to see you wake up," Dean chuckled as he placed a hand on my shoulder as I locked eyes with him as well.

    "I wake up like that every morning because I never seem to want to wake up at all,"

    Dean smiled at me as he held my hand in his. He placed a hand on my shoulder and made me get closer to him as he peeled me out of the bed. The weight I had lost had been put onto my body once more. I smiled at my small amount of muscle and chub on my body. I had never been so happy to see fat in my life. Dean helped me out of my bed and helped me towards the bedroom. I turned to look at my body as I moved closer to him, taking in the sight of my own body. I shivered as I moved closer to him and tried to get more of a look at my body in the mirror above the sink. I moved closer to brush my teeth but Dean watched me over with careful eyes.

    I spat out my toothpaste and locked eyes with Dean in the mirror and held the toothbrush in midair, "What?"

    "Are you sad that this is all over with this one. We all know we can't hit the nineties or real shit can start going down. We're already pushing it when we got to the seventies and eighties. I can't believe it all ends here."

    I let out a sigh as I spat out some more toothpaste into the bowl. I wiped my mouth and moved closer to the mirror to inspect my face. My hands went up to my face as I washed it with some soap next to the sink which seemed a lot sketchier than what I had hope it would be. Dean watched me as I locked eyes with him through the mirror as I applied some more antiseptic to my face. I placed my hands on my face once more and pushed down, playing with the bruising on my face and the pain I felt when I did so.

    "I don't ever want this to end. I don't think I could ever...want it to end. I have never felt as important as I do than right now. I am saving lives in a sense and I never want to leave here."

    "But we have to leave, we can never be here for as long as you want to be, we know it would be more dangerous then what you might think."

    "I know that much, but I feel this sense of pride...even if my body is all beat up and done up like this."

    Dean chuckled as he rested his hands on his temples, "I want you to know this is as far as we're going to be here. As soon as this is done we are taking you back to present day no matter how many times you try and protest and say that you want to stay here."

    I shook my head as I sat down on the toilet and didn't even take a piss. I shifted  more as I tried to figure out what to do. It truly was the shitty place I had ever been. On one hand, I wanted to leave and get home so I can heal perfectly. On the other hand, I wanted to stay here for as long as possible. I shifted as I locked eyes with Dean.

    "I don't ever want to leave here. I don't ever want to get out of here," I shifted a little bit as I locked eyes with him. "As delusional as that sounds I don't ever want to leave my post as the patron saint of the 27 Club."

    "You're really going to take up the moniker now, after all this time spent not focusing on that you are finally going to just succumb to that now."

    I shook my head once more as I tried to figure that out. Why I was taking up this moniker now? I felt a lot better with the name. I was completely tired of looking like I was shit for doing something so holy while being so unholy. I shifted on the toilet seat and sighed more as I moved closer to him. My eyes went down to my hands as I tired to figure out what was going to happen to the others.