Hope is a Dangerous Thing [EDITING]

Chapter Seventeen

My eyes flickered open. The air around me was completely cold. Inhumanly cold. My eyes flickered around me as I looked at the around the entire area. I had no idea where I was going to go. It was dark. So very dark. It had always been dark in my dreams. I looked around as I stepped forward as much as I could with my feet frozen in place. I looked around the place but found nothing. I had my entire body frozen. The air sent a chill down my spin as I looked around even more. As much as my frozen body would let me. My entire body was full of goosebumps. I was as naked as the day I was born but instead of a vagina I had a penis and instead of breasts there was a small bump that made me feel a little bit of happiness. I smiled at the bump a little bit as lights went around me. Blue shining lights moved towards me. I wanted to run away from them. Everything in my body told me to run away and yet I was standing still. My feet were frozen in place as I sat down on the ground, the only thing I could do.

    The blue lights were getting closer and closer to me. I backed couldn't back away from them. But they got closer and closer to me and landed in front of me. Blue orbs unfolded into humans. Shapes of people I had seen before. People I hadn't yet seen. My eyes drifted over to a man who wore a a plaid t-shirt over a white Guns N Roses Use Your Illusion concert shirt. His jeans were frayed at the bottoms. His eyes were tired and his blonde hair was a complete mess. He was barefoot, sitting down in front of me with his legs crossed.

    "You must be completely terrified being here," His voice was soft and stern all at the same time. "This is...where your mind is at at the moment."

    My hair hit my face as I turned around a little bit, "Is this my fucking mind? Why the hell is it so fucking dark in here?"

    "Because we're all taking up the space and draining you. I mean, you have a very creative mind when we're not taking over all of the space."

    "I know who you are," I rocked back a little bit being able to moved a little bit. "But I wish you weren't in here. In my mind."

    "Our souls are attached to you. Always in debt to you forever and ever for as long as you live."

    "I...I don't understand what you want me to do about anything right now. I can't possibly help any of you. It would be utterly useless."

    "It might be but we can help you at any cost to us. Even if it means dying again."

    "Then what would happen to your souls? I'm pretty sure that your souls would be utterly destroyed if you did that?"

    The man nodded, his golden hair bobbing with him, "Yeah, but we would still be here to help you out no matter what. We are forever tied to your soul. Our bodies may be giving that witch bitch some juice but our souls are forever locked to yours. Doesn't matter what might happen to us but as long as our souls are still in tact it doesn't matter what might happen to us. Even salting and burning our bones won't even help."

    I shot my eyes to the man as his eyes went to mine. He looked me over with careful eyes. His words sunk in a little bit. I was their personal hell in all senses of the word. I was to forever be their hell. I let my eyes drift to the other people around me. A woman with teased up long black hair and thick winged eyeliner looked me over. Her eyes were completely full of sadness. I had no way of helping anyone. It would be too much for me to try and explain that I hadn't meant to be born at all that I didn't even want to be a hell span. I never wanted to be one of those people who made other people's lives worse.

    I opened my mouth a little bit before closing it up. My words would fall on deaf ears no matter what I said. I would just be one of those who had lied to them. Another one who would be lying to them. Even if I was telling them the truth it would be nothing but another lie to them which sucked to me. I would never want to lie to some of my heroes...my idols if you could even call them that. I would never want to lie to them. I would only want to tell them all the truth and yet they would never want to hear me out.