Lethal

Chapter Twenty.

It had been a week since my breakup and I'd felt emptier than I ever had before. I resented the way that everything else in the world remain unchanged, while I felt as though I was a shell of a person. My self-pity intensified with each passing day; Jibri made sure that a fresh set of flowers was delivered everyday and it only made me miss him more.

I resisted the urge to call him, to say that all was forgiven, every morning when I woke up and every night after blindly stumbling into my apartment after ten too many drinks at the bar around the corner. Getting drunk was the only way that I could numb the pain that I felt every time that I imagined him kissing her. It was the only way that I could ignore the way that my blood boiled at his stupidity.

I couldn't even remember what day of the week it was when a loud and relentless banging on my front door pulled me out of my sleep. I groaned, rolling over and trying my best to muffle the sounds with my pillow. When that didn't work, I dragged myself out of bed and walked to my door.

A sick part of me wanted it to be him, I missed him so much that I could hardly breathe. My sister pushed the door open as soon as I soon as I twisted the knob. She gave me a knowing look before walking to my kitchen. I confusedly shut the door before following her. Aisha's face was contorted in a scowl as she took in the countless bouquets that were set atop my kitchen counter.

"What are you doing here?" I asked her, my voice was so gravelly that I barely recognised it.

Aisha huffed, taking in my appearance with disappointment. "No Zana, the question is what are you doing? You've been ignoring my calls for a week and the only time I see you is when you're drunkenly updating your social media. What's going on?"

"Jibri kissed Yanise and now I'm single." I shrugged, grabbing a bottle of wine from the fridge. "I also feel like a sack of shit, but that's a known side effect of having your world flipped upside down."

My sister snatched the bottle away from me, "Oh for the love of God, tone down the dramatics!" She rolled her eyes. "Are you going to drink yourself to death because a boy fucked you over? You've been through much worse."

"I have to disagree with that Aisha. I love him and now I don't have him anymore." I felt my throat constrict, I hadn't discussed him or how I felt since we broke up. "I've never felt anything worse than what I'm feeling right now, Aisha."

She sighed sadly as she took inventory of my emotional state, opening the wine bottle and emptying its contents down my kitchen sink. "Listen baby, I know that it hurts and I'm sorry that you're going through this, but you can't do this to yourself. You're drinking yourself into an early grave Zana and you're meant for far greater things than that."

Aisha began rifling through my cabinets, I was unsure of what she was doing until she started to gather all of the alcohol that I kept there.

"I stupidly let this drinking shit get out of hand, and for that I'm sorry. I should've been a better sister." Aisha said as she discarded all of the bottles. "But I'm not going to let you wallow because that idiot showed his true colors."

My body sagged against the fridge and I broke down, I didn't have anything left in me. "He's not a bad guy A." I laughed humorlessly. "I'm a mess, but I still want him."

"Oh Za." Aisha sighed, abandoning the remaining bottles and gathering me up in a hug. "You'll be okay, I promise. I'll do your hair while we talk, does that sound good?"

I nodded half heartedly and allowed her to take me to my bedroom where I sat in front of my vanity and let her do what she wanted. It was amazing how different I looked in a week; the bags under my eyes had a purplish tint that made me look older than I was. My hair was a mess, I'd been stuffing it under hats when I had to go to work because I didn't have any desire to look nice. Which in itself was bad for business; my entire job was looking nice and making others trust me to do the same for them. But, I couldn't bring myself to care about that.