Mines

Chapter Twelve

I can't. I can't. I can't. I won't. I won't. I won't. I can't and I wont. I can't leave Herc and Laf, I can't leave them. I don't know how I would survive without them, because surely if I'm being transported to another cell, that means my schedule will never line up with them, I'll never see them. The best I could hope for is seeing them across the huge quarry during meals. I've been with Herc for most of my life, we were thrown together here at the same time, I've never been without him. We were childhood friends once, and I've grown equally attached to Lafayette. Even now I can see both of their eyes widen as the meaning of this soldiers words sink in. They both know what this could mean for me, but Alex... Alex doesn't know.
"Don't do it. Please don't," Laf whispers, and he suddenly grabs my arm like a vice, and shouts: "If you take him I'll go too!" But I don't want him to come with me, because I know he wants to stay here with Herc, and his feelings grown for him everyday. Leaving him would break him, like it's breaking me. I pry his fingers off, and step forward.
"You don't want to get in trouble, Laf." and I know he understands that I mean: I don't want you to do this for me. He's going to respect my decision. This I know, but it turns out I'm wrong.
"Non! You no you can't do this!" he shouts, reaching for my arm again, but I careen out of his way.
"We don't know what's going to happen." Herc says. It seems like a harmless phrase to say in front of the guard and all, but knowing me, Lafayette will understand what he really means. I suddenly feel the sharp stinging in my eyes that means tears are coming, but I can't cry. Not yet, I need to stay strong for a few more minutes... just a few more and I can let myself go.
"You don't have to put up a fight, because Laurens doesn't have a choice but to come. If you don't want trouble to come your way, I suggest you stop trying to keep him here." The guard finally says, I've been wondering when he was going to finally speak up, and I'm grateful for this. I don't want Laf to hurt himself on my behalf. When our cell door opens, I'm pulled through, and it clangs shut with final crash. I'm taken down the long hallway, and then turn left as I'm led to the solitary cells. This is worse then I could have imagined. I would have at least have liked to be taken to a cell with other, gruesome slaves. After being shoved in the last cell in the hallway, and having cried all the tears that I can feel my body can hold, I realize I have lost my lifeline.

*****

A little boy runs through a field full of flowers, the day is warm and the sun has spilled its light onto the dandelions, making them glow yellow. He trips over a stone in the field that his toddler self didn't notice, and falls to the ground scraping his knees. He still crying when women with curly, dark brown hair that flows down her back in waves comes over with a small first aid kit. Perhaps she knew of the boys clumsiness and was prepared for the worst when they ventured together to this meadow. After patching up his wounds, the mother brushes the boys curly light brown bangs from his splotchy red eyes and kisses his forehead.

The same boy watches from the safety of the stairway as two parents fight. The man with his angry eyes glares at the women as she points in the general direction of the boys room, saying something that the little boy can't quite understand. The man's eyes seem to flash red, and in a moment of fury he slaps the women with the dark hair across the face. The sight of his mother crying causes the boy to start to wail as well, and the man, hating the sounds of children screaming turns on the boy.

The boy runs with his mother, as she clutches her purse and the boy's hand, tears streaming down her face, they rush away from the home of her spouse, and down a street filled with disproving eyes.

In the small dirty apartment, the boy hugs his mother as she coughs violently in bed, with doctors around her, trying to pull the sobbing child off her.

The boy stands beside his mothers grave holding a flower someone in a dark robe gave him at the start of the funeral. He tosses it down with the other flowers, and it starts to rain and the child starts to cry as he sees a dandelion fall among the other flowers.

The child watches behind the couch as his father shouts for more beer, cursing the boy for the money he costs to keep. Talking about the horrible things he'd do to him.

The teenager standing in the empty school bathroom, cutting open one of his wrists with scissors he had taken from class.

The teenager runs from home, having just came out to his dad, and it having gone horribly wrong, wondering about his actions and how they lead him to this moment, thinking he should have his kept it quite instead.

The child that had suffered so much walking through the run down town that he had grew up in, built on the outskirts of a desert. His choice to wander through the dunes until he died from dehydration planted in his mind.

The young man, awakened by the force that was throwing him into a cell, with two other people.