𝐞𝐜𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐲, shawn mendes

iii | 'the girl behind that voice'

venus carerra
15/10/18
6:15pm
san francisco, usa

"I need some air." I whisper to myself, pushing past the other band to get to the door so I could breath, finally.

The applause, the cheering, the crowd, everything. The intimate, momentary glance I shared with the stranger at the back. It was all overwhelming for me, a girl who'd only ever performed in her godmother-turned-boss' coffee shop for four years.

I push hard on the fire exit door, finally exhaling once it opens. My eyes scan the back lot of the bar, searching for an appropriate place to sit while I regain some of my sanity. I choose a bench adjacent to the door, dusting it off with my hand and sitting down.

In, and out. I close my eyes and breathe like that until I can think straight, resting my head against the brick wall.

"You ok there?" A deep voice enquires, forcing my eyes open.

"Oh, uh, yeah. I think so." I chuckle, tucking a loose, untamed strand of hair behind my ear.

"Post-show nerves?" He asks, sitting down in the small space next to me. I make more room for him, "You're wondering if it went as well as you thought? Whether everyone else enjoyed it as much as you enjoyed performing? I've been there, trust me."

"Oh, really? You're a performer too?" I ask, rolling my head around to face him. It's at the moment when our eyes meet when I realise two things. One, he's the stranger I had a moment with. And two, he knows all about post-show nerves. Because it's Shawn Mendes, the boy my best friend has been obsessed with since 2013. "Of course you are. Holy shit."

"Yeah, you could say that." He chuckles.

"Shawn Mendes." I whisper, feeling awfully stupid and knowing I'm coming across as a fan girl. "Sorry. I just thought I was hallucinating for a while there."

"It's cool. And your name is?"

"Venus." I reply simply, wondering how he didn't already know that.

"Your real name." He presses.

"That is my real name." I protest.

"So it's not a stage name? Holy shit." He scratches his head. "What's your full name?"

"Venus Estrella Carerra." I tell him. "I think my mom had a little premonition about my dream career."

"It's like you were born for it." He whispers, "I, on the other hand, were not. Shawn's hardly a rockstar name, is it?"

"I guess you make it work. All those girls you have after you don't seem to mind." I chuckle, "Kidding, my best friend is one of them."

"Is she a fan?"

"She claims she's your biggest." I giggle. "If she knew I was talking to you, oh boy."

"Is she here tonight?"

"Yup." I nod. "You don't have to, y'know, meet her or anything. In fact, she'd die if you did. Literally."

"I don't mind." He insists. "As a thank you to her best friend, for performing like that."

"You liked it?"