9 months since I last saw you and three months since we last spoke. What am I supposed to do? We've been dancing around the idea of being together. Those playful touches turned to shameful grasps. Lustful stares turned to ones of longing.
Now? Now we sit on opposite sides of town , different universities but still the same continent. What makes it worst is that I know nothing could ever come from our friendship but that what it already is because you had already moved on. Claimed a mate , one of my best friends in fact. She deserves someone as good as you , she also doesn't deserve me yearning for something that belongs to her.
But sometimes , on days when the sun is just below the mountain and the sky becomes natures canvas with alluring warm colours of red and blue , I sit on the bench. The one so famously used in our years of friendship. Out-looking as the stars begin to wake , I wonder if maybe I deserved you too. Had I missed out on my chance?
So foolishly looking passed your obvious gestures for more. Taking for granted the gentle brushes your lips made against my forehead as we huddled together. My thighs warming your sides as your lean arms embraced my waist.
Now I sit here , alone and cold. The only source of warmth coming from the hopes that maybe I could get over you. That one day I'll sit here and not miss the way when our eyes met that the world slowed around us and became a static blur. That the pain I feel when I think of what happened to what we had slipped down the drain.
All that's left between us are loud arguments and petty fights. A battle between who made their point first and what was more relevant. Isn't it a shame that we've been reduced to "has been" and not "yet to be"? Or maybe none of this meant anything to you at all. Maybe in the end you were perfectly wrong for me and that's why its so hard for me to leave the thought of you behind.
