The Three Body Problem

Chapter 1

It started as a joke on the Watcher's part. They were amused by the simple, pointless lives of players, and wanted to pretend to live like one for a while. So they'd slipped inside Grian's head, as he was one of the more entertaining ones. That decision had sealed their fate - and their consciousness inside Grian's head. As it turned out, players were simply not meant to be vessels for Watchers, and now they were trapped there forever.

The Watcher had first revealed themself to Grian a few months before he moved on from Evo. It was stressful for both of them - to live as two minds inside one body, and to keep the other Evolutionists from finding out. The fact of the matter was that Grian and the Watcher did not get along. The Watcher thought Grian was too inferior for them to even consider respecting him, and Grian thought the Watcher was a stuck-up twit (he was right).

Eventually, though, they worked out a grudging, mutual respect and learned to get along. After that, Grian got far fewer headaches, and the Watcher stopped criticizing everything Grian did.

They got invited to Hermitcraft. Well, Grian got invited to Hermitcraft. The Watcher was still a secret. Grian accepted immediately, and the Watcher argued with him for weeks about it. Still, Grian refused to change his mind.

Had the Watcher known what was going to happen once they joined the Hermitcraft world, they would have protested even more and done everything in their power to prevent Grian from accepting that invitation.

It was nighttime, and no one else was on the server but them. Usually, Grian would have let the Watcher take control of the body by now, just to let them have a chance to stretch their muscles. Tonight, however, Grian was on a build high, and he couldn't have handed over control of the body if he wanted to.

We ought to go to bed, grumbled the Watcher. You're going to get us killed, building in the ocean at night like this.

"Can't be bothered," Grian said out loud. "Bed's all the way back at spawn."

We'll be back at spawn anyway if we die. Except if we die, we'll lose our stuff, so we'll probably die again trying to get back to it.

"Don't try to use logic on me, it won't work!"

The Watcher sighed. Never does.

A drowned ate them not 30 seconds later, and the Watcher radiated a loud, smug, "I told you so" sort of emotion inside Grian's head. As he laid down on one of the beds set up at spawn, Grian told them to shut up.

Something incredibly peculiar happened once Grian closed his eyes: time stopped. You see, all players feel the passage of time in the world they are in - it's one of those things that separates players and Watchers. Watchers are more powerful beings, and consider themselves to be superior to such concepts as time. Therefore, over time (ironically), the Watchers actually lost the ability to feel the passage of time. This is why the Watcher had no idea that anything out of the ordinary had happened.

Grian kept his eyes shut. He didn't seem to have much of a choice in the matter - no matter how hard he tried, his eyelids wouldn't move.

...hello?

Who are you ? The Watcher demanded immediately.

...i am me.

Of course, silly me. That makes perfect sense.

Grian hushed the Watcher and addressed whoever - or whatever - else was inside his head. Do you have a name?

i believe i am Poultry Man. i am in need of a body. can i have this one?

This one's taken , snarled the Watcher.

Shut up, it's my body, not yours.

But I exist within its confines as much as you do!

You didn't seem to care that I was in here when you invited yourself in, Grian pointed out. Poultry Man, what are you? Are you a mob?

mob? mm. no. i am not.

What do you want a body for?

i need to have a body to throw eggs.

Grian wasn't sure if he'd heard him right. Throw eggs?

yes!

What for?

it's funny to watch people react.

It clicked. You prank people!

yes! but only harmless pranks. with eggs.

I suppose it wouldn't hurt to let you in for a bit, Grian mused.

The Watcher had other ideas. Absolutely not! You cannot seriously be considering this!

I'm not.

The Watcher sighed in relief. Oh, thank goodness.

In fact, I'm not considering it at all: I've already made up my mind. Come on in, buddy!