Under the moonlight

Chapter 10

I'm in my room when pain rushed through me. The light is around me but I am suffocating in this dark world. My choice was made but in a way I regret it. The feeling of pain and the numbness of my senses. So much has happened to me yet I just can't give up. I am broken but yet have a will to live and move forward. I must find a way out of this place and become free once again. I want to escape this place and my mind of the horrors that I have witnessed.

Everything haunts me in my wake or even when I'm dreaming. I hear the experiments screams in my dream and then see that it is me on the table being sliced apart and having things attached to me. In this world I am just a toy to a beast and an amusement to a mad doctor. I thought I knew Victor and I found him as light but he is so dark in truth. The one I found most fighting is part of the light and it confuses me. This upside down world where everything is different.

I allow myself to cry into my pillow as I fall to sleep. A game that's all this is to the master but this is my life now. The cold drifts through me making me shiver. No matter how tightly I pull the covers around me I am not free from my own shaking. I look past the dark room at my shaking hands how have they become like this. My sturdy hands that made beautiful art are now tired and worn.

Even if I could go back to my world I wouldn't belong there anymore either. I wonder if anyone is missing. I have died in that world, so does my family morn? If I was only brave enough I would take off this necklace and yet I can't. My stubborn spirit isn't ready to give up like my mind and body is. If only I could find myself between this daze of sleep and wake then maybe I could change.

The images haunt me in my dreams when I finally fall to sleep. If darkness and light swirling my past and present showing. I smirk to myself remembering what my mother would say to me. "You might not have yesterday anymore and you might have wasted today but tomorrow is always the time to change. So be brave and love the life that you make."

With that memory I drift into a more pleasant dream until I wake up to the sunlight shining into my room. Today will be different I just know it. It has to be so I tilt my head up forging bravery and start to get ready. Time fly by and I find myself in the garden watching everything around me. Studying the roses and the trees to see their curves and beauty. This place isn't evil it isn't the ground that caused pain but the people. To change people you must start with yourself or else you will never get anywhere.

I crawl out of bed and walk out into the halls in my nightgown. The staff doesn't pay me any attention to me when I sit near the island. I eat some fresh fruit while they make eggs and toast for me. I eat the food then head back into my room. I ignore all the maids and knocks at the door.

I've already walked this place as far as I can see from my window in my room. I don't think I can get too far out of sight without running into guards. I've been close enough to see them patrol and the train barracks are close to the manson.  It's so strange to look at the help now because they are human. They are also controlled by a beast. I don't understand how this could happen. Every part of it is truly insane. I want to escape but I have no help.

Wait, that's not true! Realization hits me and I start running through the hall. I barge into Isabelle room to find her lying lifeless in her bed. I scream and run over to her dropping to my knees crying. A cold hand reaches up and touches my face.

"Don't cry Allegra I've been dead for a while now. That's why Victor is always here he has to keep giving me treatments to make me live. With the help of the doctor my skin hasn't started to rot yet." She says in a soft voice.

"So you won't be able to leave even if you did get better?" I ask confused with tears still pouring down my face.

Even my friend that I have become so close with is a lie. I look at the corpse before me that contains a young spirit. How can this all be happening to me. Did I really deserve all of this for an accident. Even though it was an accident my actions had consequences so great. I'm so broken down but I don't want to stay broken. I want to be okay. I would be happy with just okay at least I wouldn't be dead or tortured that way.

"I will never get better my life I already feel myself passing on." She says in almost a whisper. "That's all because of you really. Now that I have had such a good friend I can be happy in whatever comes next. I want you to know I love you like a sister and that to be free for the both of us."

The door slams open and Victor storms inside. His eyes are a furious red. "Dammit, I was too late getting here I can't bring her back twice that's one of the conditions to my power."

Her body collapses in front intent of my very own eyes. It's as if all her organs vanish along with my will to breath. Somehow, I manage but my heart seems to be in disarray. I look to Victor a once friend and now turned monster. He frowns slightly but reaches out and pats me on the back. I flinch away and regret it after seeing the hurt within his eyes.

He speaks to me lightly before leaving. "Even though I am a monster to humans it doesn't mean that I didn't see you as my friend. So allow me to warn you to stay away from the master while he is grieving. He tends to lash out whenever he is in pain."

I make my way back to my room in a numbed state. I curl up with tears lingering in my eyes but too tired to cry. Soon though I find myself walking once again. Too a familiar place of the experiments cells. They each turn my way but no of them daring enough to come closer. My wits were at a end and I am done for my attempts of escape.

For the next few days I mindlessly work for the doctor hearing nothing from the master. The experiments come and go some lasting longer than others. Though I don't remember any more of them that time has passed. My heart is too broken to care for another and for it to be lost forever. Though soon my routine is forced to a halt and I no longer can ignore the fact of my existence.

The master called me to his side not too long after his betrothed death. Victor sits by his side and gasps when he sees me. I haven't been eating or anything other than bathing occasionally. My nightmares of Isabelle's death only increase in horror. The master doesn't look in much of a different state than always, well kept and like a statue.

The master takes his eyes off the floor and then snarls. "How dare you not be taking proper care of yourself. Sit on the bed admediatly."

I just nod and do as he says the fight in me has dwindle to ashes. Moments later there's food in front of me. I hardly notice what goes own around me any more my head hurts too much to focus. I hear a growl and then a squeal of a chair being moved across the room. The master sits in front of me with a fork in hand.

"Open."  He commands with food the being placed inside my mouth. " Chew and swallow but don't be in a hurry if you haven't ate since the incident then your stomach will be much too small."

I sigh but do as he says and after I eat half of it I almost fall off the bed from dizziness. He catches me and pays me under the cover. I feel hot but sweat beads down my body cold. I hear someone yell but can't make out what they are saying. Soon my body starts to shake and I want to cool down but I feel cold. Something is wrong my body is at war I don't know what to do. The pain rushes to my head and I think I scream but I'm not sure. Then everything comes to a sudden stop and I can't breath. No, I don't breath and the ringing in my head has stopped.

Time has frozen or am I dead as well? No suddenly I feel a jolt and my heart steadier now. I try to open my eyes but I just can't so I let out a sigh instead. I feel warm and safe now as if everything has disappeared. My worries have vanished along with the nightmares. I want to stay like this for a little while longer.