Chapter 21 - Pie

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I wake up to the sun shining in my face. After letting out a big yawn, I roll over to grab my phone. I see the time, 10:45. Shit.I'm supposed to meet Mary at 11. 

I jump up out of bed, throwing the covers off of me. I run to my closet and put on a mint green spaghetti strap dress that is form-fitting. I grab my white cropped denim jacket and pull it on over top of the dress. I quickly slip on my white mule sandals. I don't have time for makeup so I just grab my phone and purse and quickly run down the stairs. 

I run past Meghan as I head out the door. I hear her yell something at me, but I'm in a rush so I don't stay to figure out what that is. 

Since Mary lives not too far down the road I walk to her house, quickly that is.

Once I reach her door, I look at the time to see I am a few minutes late. I knock on the door and she opens it, flashing a small smile and inviting me in.

We walk in and sit on her couch. Mary and I awkwardly stare at each other, unsure of who's going to say what first. 

"Mary, I wanted to apologize," I say suddenly, my hand reaching out onto her knee.

"I was a jerk, you were just thinking about me and I didn't realize it." My face softens, looking at her for a response. 

"No, I'm sorry. I was being rude. I had no right to say all of that." Mary replies. 

"You were just being a good friend," I say, trying to comfort her.

Mary shakes her head. 

"No, I wasn't. I was being selfish." She says sternly.

"I was jealous that he was getting time with you. I was worried I was going to lose you." She looks at me with regret in her eyes.

"Mary, you'll never lose me," I reply softly.

"I know, I've just never seen you like this before. You really like him and I was worried so I tried to blame him for something he didn't do." I can tell she's really beating her self up inside for what she said to me yesterday.

I let out a big sigh.

"Well, how about we just forget this ever happened?" I say happily, with a hint of sarcasm. 

Mary smiles and lets out a small giggle.

"I'd like that very much." She leans over, giving me a hug. I squeeze her back, letting her know I'm here.

"I love you Mar," I say, happy that we have made up.

"Love you too, Cammie. Sorry about everything." She replies.

"Sorry about what? I don't remember anything to be sorry about." I joke to which she laughs.

After that, we make pancakes and spend the morning together. She wishes me luck for the rest of the day, letting me know she's thinking of me today. She knows what today is.

I return home and have a little bit of time to hang out. I spend that time in my room, listening to sad music. Bad mistake.

With my eyes red and puffy, I make my way to the car to pick up my sister. When she gets in the car, I'm sure she can't help but notice my eyes. 

"Are you okay?" She asks, sitting down in the passenger seat.

"Ugh, I made the mistake of listening to sad music today," I say sarcastically, rubbing my eyes. 

She laughs and we drive off. 

When we pull up, we both look at each other and unbuckle. Getting out of the car, we slowly close the doors shut.

As we make our way through the cemetery, I can't help but feel as though I'm walking over dead people. I try my best to walk in between gravestones rather than in front of them. 

When we find my dad, we don't say much, we just look at each other and back to his headstone. 

"5 years already," Luna says quietly. As she continues to talk, my fingers can't help but trace the engraved letters, Patrick Newman. I watch as Luna takes something out of her purse, a golf ball. My dad loved to golf. 

"I can't believe it's been that long Dad. We miss you here." She says, sitting down and placing the ball in front of the stone. I find myself following her lead, I sit down and rest my head on his headstone.

"Hi Dad," I say softly. 

"I hope you've had a good year. I'm sorry I haven't come around much, I've missed you. I'm still playing volleyball and hanging out with the girls. Oh and I graduate college next year, can you believe it? Your baby girl, graduating college. I wish you could be there. I miss you every day. There's not a day that goes by where I can't hear your laugh ringing through my mind. Anyway, Luna and I are going to get some banana cream pie after this, so I hope you'll be joining us. I love you, Daddy." I close my eyes as tears stream down my face. I can't help but hug the gravestone as I hear Luna tell Dad all about her past year. 

Once we finish talking to him, we both stand up and hug each other for a while. I don't want to let go of her. We say our goodbyes and walk back to the car, both of us wiping the tears our of our eyes.

As we drive to our next destination, the song "Not Afraid" by Eminem comes on the radio. That was his song. It was his motto for when he got sick, that was all he would sing and listen to. Luna and I look at each other, she turns the music up and we burst out singing all of the lyrics. 

🎶"I'm not afraid

To take a stand 

Everybody

Come take my hand

We'll walk this road together, through the storm" 🎶

With this song playing, we can't help but cry. It's a happy cry as we know our dad is here with us. When the song is over, we feel relieved to know he is watching over us. Knowing that he is with us today, of all days, is extremely special. 

I pull into the parking lot of Betsy's Pies. Luna and I hop out and head into the restaurant, finding a spot at the counter to order our pies. We sit on the bright red stools, looking around at this old-school diner that our Dad loved.

Our Dad stopped here at least every Friday to get a pie to bring home. Other times, he would bring Luna and me to get a slice and joke for us to "not tell mom".

We both order his favorite, banana cream pie. Luna and I reminisce about his funny sense of humor, our favorite memories and some of the weird ones too. 

The pie here is absolutely delicious so we finish it quickly after we've been served. When we go to pay the bill, our waiter tells us it's already paid for. After asking what she means, she points us to an older couple in a booth not too far from us and tells us they paid for our pie. 

Luna and I walk over to thank them and they graciously accept, telling us to pay it forward another time for them. It's just another sign that Dad is with us today.

When the day is over, I lay in my bed thinking about everything. My mind wanders to the thought of Maddox and how I see similarities between him and my father. 

I try to shake the thoughts out of my mind, but I can't. I know I'm going to have a hard time sleeping tonight. 

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