Destiny or Coincidence?

Chapter 34

Hai everyone,

This chapter is not edited so please excuse my grammatical mistakes and enjoy the chapter... Happy reading...

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Athira Patel

Jealousy is a small word but it does much more than a little word. It creates anger, hurt and at the same time sadness to a person that they want to burst on others or do anything at that time just to divert it and sometimes even not able to accept that they are jealous. Because if we accept that we are jealous then we have to accept many more feelings for which we are still not ready. So instead we just ignore the fact and embrace the one which we want to think.

Jealousy is the indication of new feelings that are giving birth in our heart without knowing us. And at the same time, it's the indication of coming hurt and heartbreak which we don't realise.

Everyone says that jealousy is good because then, we know that we have feelings for the other but what they don't know is that it's the start of new heartbreak and sadness too. I agree that the feeling of jealousy is something which we cannot express in words because it is an overwhelming emotion with the combination of different feelings like anger, sadness, hurt, insecurity and even which includes the punching. To feel that emotion is rare because not everyone can feel that kind of true feelings, only when the feelings are true then we feel this kind of possessiveness and jealousy for the other.

But the thing is I am not ready to accept that this feeling as jealousy because I am not ready to accept any kind of feelings for him in the fear of getting hurt again.

Tears are pouring out of my eyes the moment i got out from the restaurant and was waiting for the cab but instead I just took a seat near the side path and folded my legs near my body with my hands encircling it and by keeping my head on it while pouring my heart out for once lonely. For once i accept that i felt jealousy towards her and for once I accept that I like him. But i am scared to accept those feelings for him that I am running away from it as far as possible.

"Damn you Omisha. Why in the hell you have to kiss him in front of me? Why you have to showcase your feelings for him like that? Why you have to always rub in my face that he is not going to be mine? Why goddammit? WHY???" I shouted from the top of my lungs crying like an idiot on the road while clutching my stomach due to the pain.

"What have I done to you that you have to hurt me like this? I already know that he is not mine and can never be. Hell, I don't even want him to be in the first place. Then why you have to rub it on my face and mock me on that?" I mumbled to myself while crying and facing the sky to control my emotions and the pain that is radiating from the pit of my stomach.

"Go away dammit. I don't want to remember you. I don't want to get hurt because of you. Go away Abhilash..." I cried hiccuping "go away," i said by placing my head on my legs and letting the tears fall from my eyes.

I want to punch something or anything in place of her due to the frustration I am feeling right now, so while plucking the grass hardly when i got in contact with the stone, I immediately took it in my hands and threw it with all my force on the opposite side of me without even glancing upwards. When the stone hit something very hard which in turn made the big sound then I immediately glanced upwards only to see that I have hit a car and it's not even the normal car but the Audi.

"Oh my god... Oh my god.." I placed my hand on my mouth panicking by looking at the car in horror where i have damaged the side of the back door in my frustration.