A Collection of Words

Heaviness

I've been outside once this week. The eventual dread of the next coming day always leads me shut down, to become inanimate, to lie in bed until my muscles feel too sore and I have to switch positions. Because of this I resort to the internet as an outlet, to pour out all my feelings and to talk to others like me. They understand me and what I am going through, and if I didn't have them I would have no one. Recently I found a group of people that I confided all my feelings to, but we're drifting apart because of the burdens of life. People have their own lives to live, their own problems and events to overcome. But I've been outside once this week and it's hard to overcome such large hurdles in my life. It's hard to gain the motivation to even leave bed, and I'm supposed to be going to school everyday. I know things will get better, they always do, but I just needed to pour my feelings out, even if no one will read this.