How To Survive Adolescence

#8 Believe That You Are Beautiful

#8 Believe That You Are Beautiful

A/N 

Before I start, I need to say that this is going to be particularly difficult to write because I struggle with this more than most of the other things I talk about. This issue is one I have actually struggled with, cried over and become seriously upset about. My confidence and self esteem are improving and are better now than they have probably ever been but I still have bad days. I wanted to address this to let you know that it can get better. No matter how bad you feel about yourself now, there will be a time when this changes and you do believe that you are beautiful. 

Let me ask you a simple question which no one really seems to know the answer to.

What is beauty?

noun                                                                                            >the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations (as shape, color, sound, etc.), a meaningful design or pattern, or something else (as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest). 

Beauty isn't defined as prefect skin, sleek hair or a specific body type.

Beauty can be anything. 

Beauty is all the good things you are and every good, kind thing you do.

Beauty is you. You are beautiful.

Beauty is more than the physical appearance. This is important to say because people forget that you can be a beautiful person regardless of how you actually look. 

If you think about it though, have you ever seen a person who has not one single beautiful physical quality. I can't think of a single face that is without at least one beautiful part. Without freckles. Without kind eyes. Without a warm smile. Without rosy cheeks. Every single person has something beautiful, most people have an infinite number of beautiful traits and qualities if you look close enough. It's too easy to rule out 'beauty' because a person has flaws or because they aren't 'perfect'. This brings me to my next point. No one is perfect. A person with many beautiful traits isn't better or more beautiful than a person with only one, they're just different. It is what makes us diverse and unique but never 'more' or 'less' than anyone else.

Seeing the beauty you posses is possibly one of the most difficult things for many people, not only teenagers. To see past your imperfections, to admire the wonderful features you have and to accept it as beautiful is not easy.

I could, as many of you probably could, look in a mirror or at a picture of myself and immediately hate what I see. It's so easy to dislike your appearance. It's much harder to see the beauty. This is why I try to spend time looking in the mirror or at a picture (as much as this sucks) and pick out the features which are beautiful.

If you had asked me years, or maybe even months ago, if I thought I were beautiful I would have probably laughed in you face and told you no. I wouldn't have even considered it. Now though I realize that I can own my beauty, I can say 'I Am Beautiful' because I am. It's not vein to say this. I'm not claiming to be gorgeous or perfect. I am merely saying that I see my beauty. 

We have choices when we look at ourselves. We chose what we see. I could look in the mirror and see my blemished skin and tell you that  I can't possibly be beautiful because of it. I could however look a little closer and see my warm brown eyes, my dark, thick eyelashes and my long curly hair. I could see all the personality traits which make me the person I am. I could see all the good things and accept that I'm beautiful despite the blemishes on my skin or other imperfections I have.

Beauty is never defined by one feature or characteristic but it only takes one beautiful feature to make you beautiful (although I promise that there are many, many beautiful features which you possess).

I was going to discuss beauty in relation to the body as well as the face but this chapter is longer than I thought (although it wasn't planned I just started writing and it all came out). I will write a chapter on that another day but for now I will leave it with a special request. 

Reading this is great but unless you actually see it for yourself it probably won't make that much of a difference. With that in mind please go look in the mirror and tell yourself why you are beautiful. Find your favourite features and keep those in your mind everyday. When you feel down or when you feel unattractive remember those things. Remember why you are beautiful. It may, as it did with me, take years for you to build up enough self esteem to even believe that you are beautiful but if you can at least find one beautiful thing, one beautiful feature, then that's a very wonderful thing. 

If you could, please comment and tell me these two things:

>One of your beautiful personality traits

>One of your beautiful physical traits

I know this is difficult to do but it isn't everyone else who decides how beautiful you are or how beautiful you feel, that is all you (People don't have to tell you that you're beautiful for it to be true). Even if you don't have the confidence to comment please think about this and one day, when you realize how beautiful you are, find someone to tell or come back here and tell me. 

You might not know how beautiful you are yet but the beauty is there. All the beauty is in you waiting to be discovered. 

A/N

Today this story actually ranked at #367 in Short Story & #508 in Random which is completely amazing. This is because of your comments and votes so I really want to thank you for that. It's incredible that more people may get a chance to read this :)

I hope you understand what I was trying to say here. It was difficult because once I started writing all my thoughts got a little bit crazy but I really just want to get this message across. This is something so important and also probably one of the more serious and complex topics I've covered so far.

If you want to talk about anything I've mentioned here you can comment or PM me. Please keep reading and remember that you can request topics if you have anything you want me to address.

Thank you,

Jess

xoxo

P.S. The song I've chosen for this chapter is Ugly On The Inside by The Maine. This song is kind of relevant and just has a good message delivered in a fun way. 

P.P.S. For some reason I am getting really nervous about pressing the publish button. I guess it's because this is a big thing for me to talk about, it is something that has been one of my biggest demons for many years. I have put myself down about my appearance for so long but I want that to be over now. I hate to think that any of the wonderful people who read this are feeling the same way but there is a good chance that some of you have or do feel like you aren't beautiful. If you do feel like this then I hope this helped and at the very least know that I think you are beautiful-It might not mean much but it is true.