A Love That Killed

Chapter 3

Robert's POV

As I sit in the darkness alone I think of the events that took place earlier that day. How could I hit Katherine? For the second time? For absolutely no reason at all?

I shake all the questions out of my mind, and walk over to the counter where my 3 bottles of pills lay.

I pick up the first one It's an anti- depressant, the second a mood stabilizer, and the third for bipolar disorder. I slowly click open each one and place them on the counter, I pop all three in my mouth and head for my stash of liqueur.

I grab my favorite bottle and take a swig with the pills, I remember the doctors telling Katherine not to let me take my medication with it. But, a couple glasses can't hurt right?

I remember the first time my mother took me to the doctor, I was 9 years old. I began to get quit fussy with her, I was a bit of a monster back then too.

Always angry, always yelling, hitting. When my mother told the doctor my symptoms he looked over at me and shook his head. The doctor told my mother they had to run some tests to be sure of what all my problems were and medicine would have to be given, the doctor turned to me and said I was probably going to be on the medication for my entire life. That people with these sort of problems usually don't grow out of it. I looked at the ground and began to cry, and my mother took me out of the room and we left. A week after, the tests were taken and I started my medication.

When I started to act up around Katherine my mother told her that I had my set of issues, terrible ones. But she didn't care at the time, until I hit her the first time. But I saved us by asking her to marry me.

Speaking of Katherine, I wonder where she is, I haven't seen her since the morning when I had walked out of the house for work. At her mother's I assume though. I hate her mother Margaret, she is always telling Katherine to leave me. That I am no good for her, I wouldn't be surprised if her mother had her over there now introducing her to a wealthy, young bachelor.

Wait.. What if she is over there with another man right now? Is she gone?

Anger starts to consume me as I begin to hear the door wiggle open.

Katherine walks through the door, "Hello Robert" she says as she puts her coat away in our closet. I look at her in anger, and I notice when she looks at me her grey eyes begin to falter. I feel bad at what I'm about to begin.

"Where have you been?" I say In a deep growl.

"You know I was at my mother's." She sighs

"I believe differently, you were with another man." I say in a slur, the alcohol must be kicking in as I take another swig.

I look to her and I see her gasp "Robert, your not supposed to be drinking and how could you possibly think I'm with another man?"

How could she outright lie to me? I know she was cheating! Why would she stay with me, she already tried to leave me once! I stand up and start to feel the rage over take my body.

I grab her wrists and sling her against the wall.

"Robert!" She yells at me, I throw her to the ground and kick, and kick harder and harder.

But then I compel myself to stop this isn't right, I shouldn't be hurting her like this. She's my wife and I love her,

But I'm hurting her intentionally. Physically and mentally, everyday it's either one or the other or both. I need to stop, being such a monster to her.

I pick her up off the floor, at first she swats her hands at me but then she stops in defeat.

I lay her on our bed, emotionless again.

"I am so sorry, I will never do anything like this again." I say almost robotically.

"You always say that, this is exactly what I've been talking about, but you will do it again you won't change" She props herself up, slowly with difficulty and and shuffles out of the room, I hear the door shut downstairs

***

I wake in the middle of the night, it is late, my head still pounds from the alcohol from earlier in the night. I walk downstairs to get myself a glass of water, steadying myself as I almost fall down the stairs.

As the kitchen comes into view I notice an emptiness, something I can't quite put my finger on, I know Katherine is not home, so it is not her absence. But something is missing, I just know it. As I move to get a glass it hits, I turn my head slowly, desperately hoping that I'm not right.

They're not there.

I turn my head back again, repeating and turning my head again, maybe if I look again they will appear.

They don't appear again.

My boxes are gone.

And at that point my mind is clear and I know three things;

Katherine is gone,

She has the pictures

And she will know that it is all my fault that that woman is dead.

Of that woman I had tried so hard to forget.

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