The Untold Story of Mary Shelby (A Peaky Blinders Fan-Fiction)

Chapter 5 - Upturned Bed Sheets

Once Polly and Ada had left, leaving her door open slightly, Mary lay wide away, not moving a muscle with her eyes staring at the ceiling, emotionless. She was numb, her brain completely overwhelmed, reliving the previous events over and over and over again, trying to find a sense of reality in it all. Her face was pale, her fingers twitched ever so often, reminding her of her killing. In her mind, it was her killing, with it being ever so personal to her, a result of heartless actions on both parts. It made her feel sick, sick with disgust. Sick to think that people could be this evil, her brothers had warned her about this, but never in a million years did she ever think it would happen to her. 

Mary slipped her right hand under the duvet and traced over her chest with her fingertips, trying to remind herself that this was her body, nobody else's, but also trying to brush away the sensation of Williams hands that had once unrightfully lingered there. She moved her hand down to her thighs and did the same, shutting her eyes, trying to imagine a more pleasant place to be - the seaside - a foreign country with hot weather and a bright blue sea, but it was no use, her own hands felt alien to her, the feeling of being touched, even by herself made her body feel as if it was no longer hers, and was stolen property that she no longer owned. Her stomach churned and groaned at her, making her small body completely tense up, what was she? With a great sense of despair, she stopped and removed her hand, still feeling completely restless but unable to actually move. She lay so still, and so quietly, with her breathing so light and silent, she looked dead to the untrained eye.

After around an hour, Mary was in the same position, wide awake but physically numb, that was until Tommy walked into her room quietly, bringing in coal to keep the fire ticking over. After silently placing chunks of coal on the glowing fire, still not realising Mary was awake, he pulled up a chair that was in the corner of the room and sat himself down at the side of Mary's bed, soon realisng that she was awake and looking at him hopelessly. She reminded him of the helpless soldiers he saw at war, the ones that couldn't speak or move, not because of injury, but because of fear - they were often shot out of cowardice. Tommy could relate to how his little sister was feeling, afraid and vulnerable. 

Tommy nodded his head slowly whilst shutting his eyes, accepting the situation and accepting blame for the situation Mary was forced under. He bent forward, resting his elbows on his knees, and propping his face up on the palm of his hands, bending his back to look at Mary for a few minutes, before breaking the calm silence. "Oh, Mary. What are we going to do with you? You're a feisty one, I know that, and in circumstances like this, I would wish nothing less of you. What happened today should make you proud of who you are, not ashamed, not weak, but proud. You defended yourself when most other women couldn't have. You had the balls to stand up for yourself, and you had the balls to stick that knife in his chest. This is something you need to come to terms with." Tommy paused, seeing his sister nod, listening to every word he said, letting it sink into her head.

"You have murdered a man. You are a murderer, but you stabbed that bastard for an honourable fucking reason. Believe it or not, and many would disagree, but there any many forms of murder, yours not being the guilty kind. Don't you dare feel guilty about yourself, Mary, or you will have me to deal with, do you hear me?" Tommy continued, passion rising in his voice, possibly anger, possibly love for his sister, trying to make her feel better about herself. It did work, and instead of Mary reliving the event on repeat, she let every word that Tommy had spoken to her sink into her mind, fully consuming her, his voice ringing in her head. 

"Tommy, please stay with me tonight, just this once, please?" Mary begged Tommy, in a weak and pained voice, pleading him further with her glazed eyes as she looked at him. He signed and nodded, standing up from his chair and walking over to the other side of her double bed, gently getting in next to his sister, pushing away a bit of stray hair that had fallen on Mary's face. Once he had gotten himself comfy, he slipped his arm under Mary's head and waited for her to fall asleep, with her finally feeling safe. Mary wriggled closer to her brother and felt the warmth radiating off him, calming her further, but still finding it difficult to sleep.

They both lay there for a long while before Mary's body finally gave in to her tiredness, though Tommy lay awake, holding his sister shoulder gently with the arm that was slipped under her head. He felt such sorrow and pain for Mary, guilt too being an unbearable feeling that rose up in him, like a relentless sickness. The still dirty clothes that Tommy was wearing made him feel uncomfortable with the material being all twisted and restricting his movement, but that was the least of his priorities, and there was no way he would be leaving her to sort the problem out. 

Tommy must have been lying with Mary for a good few hours before Polly popped in, her eyes heavy with dark circles under her eyes, possibly mascara, possibly extreme exhaustion. A hopeless, small smile arose on her face, seeing Tommy and Mary so close once again, though the circumstances that have caused this also caused Polly to empathise with Mary, still feeling a huge sense of anger that this could have been prevented. 

"I came to see how she was doing" She whispered, sitting in the chair at the end of the bed, crossing her legs and wiping her eyes, it was three in the morning after all. Tommy noticed the darkness of her eyes and the paleness of her face as she examined him for answers. "Not great, Pol. Have faith, she... No... We will get through this together eventually though like we always do." His voice quiet too, the raspiness of his voice highlighted his fatigue, staring straight at Polly, being completely honest with her. She nodded, not wanting to make Tommy feel any more guilty than he already did, seeing the bad state in which he was in. 

"John and Arthur have both gone to bed, they are worried sick about Mary, but I can't imagine for one second that they would feel worse than you. Bates has a fucking storm coming his way, Tommy. If you don't kill him, I will mark my words." Polly spoke, pulling a pack of cigarettes out of her pocket, pinching one of many out the metal case, and lighting it, drawing in a large breath and blowing out the blue smoke, illuminated by the fire' orange glow. 

"No Pol, not now. I've decided, we all going away for a few weeks, all of us. It will give Mary time to come to terms with this, and let everything simmer down. When we come back, we will strike when he's least expecting it. We need to be grounded again Polly, the violence is getting to us all. There is a place in London I have been meaning on visiting, we shall go there." Tommy said, angering Polly more so than ever. 

"Oh, so that's it then, is it? You've decided, have you? Without talking to any of us? Remember what happened last time you did that? It's time you start listening to other people, Thomas. You will not make a single decision without consulting me first. Whatever happens in your mad head of yours should not be acted upon twenty-four / seven. As it happens, I do think this is a good idea, but this better not include fucking business, Tommy, I'm warning you." Polly threatened, drawing in another drag, slowly blowing it out across the room. 

"We leave midday tomorrow Thomas, you find us a place to stay, John and Arthur will drive. See that? That was an order, you're not the only one who gives them." She quipped, raising an eyebrow at Tommy, before getting up and slowly leaving, presumably to pack. 

Before too long, Tommy was flooded by a sense of extreme tiredness, with his eyelids feeling weak and heavy until he eventually gave in and fell into a restless sleep, with Mary now curled up in a tiny ball beside him. Tommy once again dreamt of nothing, not that he could remember anyway, and to him, this was a success, despite the fact of the uneasy feeling that sulked in his stomach - a feeling of unimaginable guilt that put him on edge for every moment after his sister was hurt. Going away for a little while was Tommy's attempt at fixing everything, starting up fresh again and taking Bates by surprise. 

Mary, however, could not get William's face out of her dreams, his wretched hands that roamed her body as if he owned it, his smug smile that was impossible to wipe off his face. Murdering him wasn't the worst part of it, no, the worst part of it was the fact that he took charge of her body and claimed it as her own. She felt like an alien in her own body, even in a dream, he had taken away her physical ownership of her body. Life was turning out to be a nightmare. 

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A/N

I am so sorry that this chapter is this short, but it seemed like a good place to end it, and a great place to pick up from. 

I hope you enjoyed! Any ideas, please do feel free to comment them, and say if you like the story so far or not!

Have a lovely day/night!

:)