[The Resident] ~~ Through The Night

Never Know What Could Happen

"Save your mom! I'll be fine!"

With that, he ran to his mom who lay on the road.

"You can't save her." It sounded like his voice, but no words left his mouth.  "You can't save her. You can't save anyone," The voice kept repeating itself as he tried to save his barely breathing mom with his bloody hands.  Sweat was pouring off his brow as tears began to stream down his face. "You can't save her. You can't save anyone."

"You can't save her."

Randolph's eyes flew open as he jolted awake. He was drenched head to toe in sweat and his white collared shirt clung to his body in a very uncomfortable way. He was still trying to catch his breath as he surveyed his surroundings. He was in his apartment, on his couch. The coffee table had multiple empty bottles of vodka on it, along with a couple of empty glasses. The TV was the only source of light in the dark living room. On the screen was an old 1980s western film, one of the many genres Randolph hated. From what he could make out through his blurry vision, the cowboys were shooting at each other with fake gun sounds and even worse acting. "Dammit, Randy," he said to himself, rubbing the back of his sweaty neck. "You know how TV sounds fuck with your sleep." But those gunshot sounds sounded nothing like his dad screaming. "save your mom!" And: "I'll be fine!" He shivered at the memory of it. The dream was so vivid. It felt more real than the one he had 2 nights ago. He knew it would just get worse for him though. He was getting closer to the day of the actual event. The day he lost everything.

"Do we have the extra tire?" Randolph's dad said for the 5th time, while loading up the car for their monthly weekend trip.

"Yes dad, I got it." Randolph said back. He had just given up getting cross at his dads anxiety. His dad was that kind of person that thought they forgot something when they really didn't. Randy had grown used to his constant repeated questions. He just answered with "yes dad, I got it," every time.

Randolph was a 3rd year resident at Chastain Park Memorial Hospital. He loved it there. Every part about that place made him happy. Except for the chief of surgery of course. If being the chief of surgery made you that cruel of a person then screw that position. He normally didn't make it to his parents weekend getaway, but today was different. He was going to tag along on this one. He finally found a break in his schedule to go on their weekend trip with them. He hadn't tagged along on one one since he was 14, and he missed it a lot.

His mom walked out of the house with her small bag of clothes and other things such as a deck of cards and her camera that she took everywhere. "You never know what could happen. That's why I always carry a camera on me," she would say with a smile.

"You never know what could happen." Randolph whispered  turning the broken camera over and over in his hand. The camera would never work again. All the saved memories on it would never pop up again. He regretted saying he didn't want to look at all the photos of him and his family when he was a kid. He regretted saying it was "boring."

He gently set the camera back down on his dresser and slowly walked to the shower. He quickly rinsed all the sweat off of him from tonight's nightmare and got into something more comfortable. He went to his bed and flopped down. Although sleep nagged at his eyes and made them want to close he didn't want to. He was scared to. He was scared to feel that fear. He was scared to feel useless again.