Am I Married?

26. A Call from Foster Home

It would be better if there was no tensed environment between us. The uncomfortable silence was like a reminder for both of us the forced relation that tied us. At times, I felt anger for Ashar for being tactless and only thinking about his pain, but there were times when I felt sorry for that man who was standing in front of him because maybe his pain, his grief was much more severe than me. I was facing the fruit of my own mistakes and foolishness, but he didn't do anything wrong. He didn't deceive anyone.

"It was you, right?" Ashar spoke in a low voice. I raised my confused gaze at him. "It was you who got the ring from me. It was you who was shaking like a leaf on that wedding day. It was you the entire time, right?"

A shadow of guilt darkened my eyes. I lowered my head in response because I couldn't find courage to accept my fraud right on his face. I was a bit surprised because it was the first time he was talking with me about that day.

"I should've trusted on my instincts." He whispered, "I felt few times that something is wrong with the woman who is standing in front of me. The different perfume, the different feel of your skin when I held your hand and your nervousness were all the hints my mind noticed at that time, but I ignored them." I felt like he was talking more to himself than me.

I shuddered all over again as the flashbacks of wedding started running through my mind. It was the most haunted day of my life. I could never forget the frightening feelings that were attached to that day. His words showed how close he was with Samara that he smelled a rat without looking the face of the woman. Maybe, he really loved her.

"Ashar, I know it's-" I stopped when he grabbed my arm roughly.

"You're giving me a very hard time. I really don't know what I should do with both of you women. Your trap is so strong that I can't even get rid of you when I want to."

The tightening feeling in the throat and short intake of breath were an indication that tears were about to pour down my face if he would not stop. Regret flooded me. His face depicted of wrath and helplessness at the same time.

"Believe me, I'm suffering like you, Ashar." My voice cracked.

"No." He left my arm with a jerk, "You did everything knowingly. You didn't get betrayed by your own beloved who kept telling you that she loved you so don't give me this bullshit that you're in pain too. Even if you're, it's because of your own actions. You should've thought about the aftermath before appearing as my bride at the Church."

I was at loss of words, feeling like whatever he was saying was a truth, even if it was bitter. I sniffled quietly, tears threatening to spill from my eyes.

"Don't give me that look." He raised his finger at me, "That pleading look. I'm not going to help you, Sanaya because I'm not that nice."

He put his hand down and trotted out of the room. After he left, I didn't hold back my tears anymore and let them race down my cheeks. 

💙

A week later, I and Aaron were both entering into the house after coming back from college when my phone started ringing in his pocket. I stopped walking and waited to get back my phone. He put it out and checked the caller ID before passing it to me, "Its Patricia."

My forehead wrinkled at the mention of her name because I got bemused. She only called me few times when she had something important to talk about. I put the phone on my ear, "Hey, ho-"

"Sanaya, please come here." She sounded restless.

"Why? Where are you?" Aaron frowned when he saw me getting worried. 

"I'm at the hospital." She sniffed, "It's about mother. Please come here quickly. I'm so scared."

I was on the edge of panic attack. My eyes widened in large circles, "What's with her?"