It's You

Chapter 18

The days passed by so quickly and I found myself working in a private company for Agricultural products. Didith also graduated after two years. We've kept in touch, going out once in a while but I've never told her about my feelings. I felt it wouldn't do us any good if we were in a relationship. We'd be awkward with each other and things like that and possibly lose our friendship if the romantic relationship wouldn't work out. So negative of me but yes, it scared me.

During the time that I was already working, I met Brenda and got close to her. She'd also met my family a couple of times on occasion. Our family and circle of friends wanted us to be a pair. She's from a good family and I didn't see any reason why I can't have a relationship with her. Can't say that she's not attractive but I didn't see her as someone I could be with or would want to be with.

"What's the score between you and Brenda?" Rod asked which surprised me because he knew all along that I was not into her.

In between sips of Coke, he looked at me, waiting for my answer. I took his glass, put it on the table, and said, "I don't have anything to do with her."

Rod would always remind me to be honest with my feelings. He wanted me to tell Didith how much I care for her. He even set up a dinner date after our graduation - me, Rod, and his girlfriend Pam and then I'll bring Didith. But I wasn't able to tell her about it and so the dinner was off.

"You look dashing," Max said as he entered the room.

"What do you mean dashing?" I laughed. "It's just jeans and a shirt like every day."

"No. You're different today. Where to?" He asked.

"It's Didith's birthday. We'll meet at Jollibee in Masinag." I brushed my hair and got my keys.

"Can I come?" Max asked. I knew he was teasing me.

"Go home!" I shouted at him. I heard him laugh.

I was at Jollibee first. I saw her half-running and half-walking after five minutes.

She was all smiles when she saw me. I can see how happy and excited she was. I was excited to see her, too.

"I'm sorry I'm late," she immediately apologized.

"I just got here myself. Have a seat first."

"Wait, it's my treat so I'll be the one to order for our food," she said. "What do you want to eat?"

"Burger and fries, and a Coke."

She took her wallet out. "Hold my bag for me."

Didith carried a sling bag. She forgot to zip it when she handed it to me. I was about to close it when I saw a Garfield notebook inside. I knew she was a big fan of Garfield. As has been our habit to check each other's bag, I took it out. To my surprise, I saw my name written on the very first leaf.

Ben

I turned a page. On the upper left corner was a date and day. Two spaces below, it was written: 'I hope he didn't notice that I was nervous when our fingers were intertwined while we were on the basketball court.'

I stopped from there, closed the notebook, and returned it to her bag. 

Was it me? I thought.

"That was a long line, sorry."

"It's okay. I'm not that hungry yet," I started on the fries.

We only stayed for an hour. I took her in front of Mercury Drug Store far ahead of the other side of the road.

"I don't want to leave yet," she was mumbling like a little girl.

"Me, too. But we've got work tomorrow." I said.

"There's another time." I can feel that she's just trying to cheer herself up.

"Didith."

"Hmm?"

I looked at her and put my right hand on her left shoulder.

"What?"

"Never mind. I forgot what I was about to say." I lied.

"I better go."

"Yes." I squeezed her hand.

"Be careful." She opened the door and waved.

"I will," I said. "Take care." I made sure that she was already inside the jeep before I left the place.

I called Rod right away when I returned home. We agreed to meet in the restaurant we would frequent.

"Are you sure it was you she was referring to?" Rod asked in a surprised tone.

"Well, I think so. I don't think there are other Ben aside from me that she's friends with."

"In the first place, why did you even peep in her diary?"

I was in denial at first. "I didn't know it was a diary."

"Hey, I wasn't born yesterday!" He took his Sprite. I remained silent.

"If you want confirmation, talk to her. Don't wait for another day or month."

"I don't know. I'm not sure."

"Not sure of what? Of your feelings for her?"

I looked down. Rod smirked.

"I'll talk to her tomorrow," I assured him.

"Good boy!"

But I didn't. I had second thoughts if it was me in her diary. 

Months came and still nothing.

Before I even realized it, time was running out of me.

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