It's Complicated (Shawn Mendes Fanfic)

Chapter Ten

“Well..I think you’re forgetting something,” he sas in a sing-song voice I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, I don't remember forgetting anything?

"Really? And what may that be?" I asked, my interest peaked. Oof, I didn't mean for those words to come out seductive, but they did, which kinda threw Shawn off a little. 

"Ahem-I told you that I would show you one of my tattoos each time we met until we ran out," he says, thrown off by my tone of voice. He rolled up his right sleeve, not looking me in the eye.
I smiled as my eyes raked the tattoo. It covered a fairly large portion of his arm, located just under the arm joint. It was in the shape of a guitar, but I could tell there was something more behind it. I waited on his explanation.

"Its so many things, all at once. It was my first ever tattoo, and it means so much to me. It's in the shape of a guitar, because I love music with all my heart, and if you glance at it sideways, it's the skyline of my homeland Toronto. Not only that, but the neck of the guitar is the soundwave of my family saying, 'I love you.' It's my favorite," he confessed to me, his voice raw and so real.

I tilted my head with a lopsided grin as I stared at the tattoo. My fingers unconsciously made there way to his arm as they grazed over the linked skin. His skin burned against my touch, but not in a bad way, it felt so good, I couldn't stop.He tensed at my touch but slowly relaxed as he stared at my fingers.

I finally pulled away, embarrassed that I had done that without thinking. "That was..Shawn I'm speechless.." I saw in awe, still not being able to pry my eyes from the awestrucking tattoo.

"Thank you, it's so important to me," he says, staring at it for a split second once more before rolling down his sleeve. He turned his attention towards me.

"I-I think I should get going Shawn," I tell him, seeing as it was getting late. I fiddled with my shawl, as he nodded understandingly, "Sure, I'll walk you." 

I didn't bother resenting because I knew it was of no use. He was stubborn as hell, but it was honestly kinda cute and gentlemanly of him. What, where is this coming from, he's my friend. Is that so? Stop trying to cage your feelings for him, it's kinda obvious by now.  What, no, I don't have feelings for him, he's just a friend. Nothing more, nothing less.

I smiled at his kind gesture as he put his hands in his pockets and walked alongside me. Our footsteps were the only sound as we walked over the cold sidewalk.

We approached my doorstep, and he turned to face me, our faces painstakingly close. My heart rate increased as I stared into those gorgeous brown eyes, an array of emotions shining from them. He licked his lips and I just stood there, taking in all of his beauty. 

He leaned in, only a centimeter, but now I could feel his breathing, which was unleveled like mine. An indecipherable look passed his eyes before he quickly pulled away, and I ran my fingers through my hair nervously. What on Earth just happened? Was he..going to kiss me? What happened?

“Cya,” he mumbled before walking briskly, not even sparing me a second glance. I ran into my room, ignoring my mother who was sitting on the couch, wanting to talk to me. I threw myself onto the bed and buried my face with my hands.

My heartbeat still hasn't returned to normal after our..encounter. I actually thought he was going to kiss me, and I wanted it. I smacked myself with a pillow. Stupid, stupid, stupid!! I barely know him, why do I have feelings for him, this is stupid! *smack* Oh my god, I totally like him?! WHY?! *smack* We’re just friends, he doesn't see anything in you more than that *smack* Ughhhhhhhhh.

I don’t know how I'll be able to face him again after what happened without turning into a tomato. I knew that I liked him, I just never admitted it to myself,ughhhhh, stupid crushes, stupid feelings, stupid me? He doesn't see anything in me anyway, so there is no reason to get all worked up about it. I should just play it cool and shove my feelings down the toilet. Who follows their heart anyway?