Falling

Panic

Link wasn't good at waiting. Never had been, and probably never would be. He always had this feeling of dread, this heavy weight on his chest when he knew something was or should be happening and wasn't. Just this morning he'd almost had a conniption on the 5 when he'd been stuck in a lane of traffic that wasn't moving quite as fast as the others. That feeling paled in comparison to how he felt right now.

He'd met with a lawyer regarding his divorce almost 3 weeks ago, and Christy still hadn't been served the papers. He knew it could take up to a month, but his anxiety was starting to get the best of him. Every time he was home he walked on eggshells waiting for her to address the paperwork he was sure she'd argue with him about, regardless of agreeing it was the best decision and saying she would sign them.

It was like waiting for the other pin to drop, teetering on the edge of a razor blade. He needed to start moving on with his life, but couldn't when he wasn't even sure what he was allowed to do. He'd been advised by his lawyer that he needed to go about life as normal as possible until both parties agreed on the terms of their separation, but Link hardly knew what was normal about pretending things were okay when they clearly weren't between the 2 adults.

They circled one another like sharks, Christy's eyes often stone cold. She'd approached him once when she realized his ring was missing but he'd brushed her off, told her he'd already said everything he needed to say for now and that she'd be hearing from his lawyers soon enough. That had gone about as well as he expected, and not for the first time they had broken out in a screaming match that had rattled the windows and her ring had wound up somewhere in the bottom of the pool. Link had slept in Lando's room that night, holding the small boy while he cried himself to sleep.

All of their children knew something was wrong, with Lily being the only one that had a more concrete idea of what was happening. It seemed like the only thing he and Christy could agree on was keeping things from the kids until they had a more solid plan. He wasn't quite sure what they were waiting for and supposed that maybe they were both just scared of having that conversation. One thing was for sure, it needed to happen sooner than later because Lincoln had withdrawn more than he'd ever done before, Lando broke out crying at random times, and Lily had started acting more like an adult than a teenage girl. Maybe it was just strange to explain to them that things were going to change when immediately they weren't? He still lived at home. Telling the kids he was leaving, then not going anywhere might just confuse them even more.

He had already thought that he would probably move out, give the house to Christy so the kids wouldn't have to be uprooted. In fact, he'd been perusing some real estate websites for rentals the past few days. He'd found a few condos he liked, but just as he figured to reach out to the realtor's he pulled back. Moving out was a big leap. Moving out meant a lot of hard work, the start of halving everything he owned, and the worst part, seeing his kids less. The alternate was staying where he was and prolonging the inevitable.

That didn't seem fair either.

He also didn't know when it was appropriate for him to leave. His lawyer told him not to do anything rash, he had too many high stake assets to risk, but he had already settled on giving Christy the house so why shouldn't he find a place? Maybe he could get Noah to help him. Her input seemed like it would be a good idea since she might be spending a lot of time there with him. Maybe someday she would even live there, too. Should he buy somewhere instead of renting?

"Link, you okay?"

He startled, Rhett's voice almost booming against the thoughts swirling in his mind. He looked around quickly at the other faces in the room, a hodgepodge of execs that were in the planning process with them about shooting Buddy System. He felt the heat in his neck, crawling up the tender skin from embarrassment at being caught