Thoughts Left Unsaid

10/29/14 -- 1:05 AM

I'm a b*tch, I know.

I keep on having this cat and mouse game with you for far too long just because I can't decide what I really want. You're sick of my mind games, you said. It's like wanting to love me and hate me at the same time. Every assurance from you is reciprocated by doubts from me. It frustrates you as hell, that you start to think if it's really worth it. But everytime I see you close to giving up, you just give me that sad smile - as if it can heal every crack I made in your heart.

And I'm sorry - I really am - if I'm this stupid, undecided girl that keeps on pushing and pulling you. I can't help it if everytime you get close enough, I tend to build tall walls around me. I'm just terrified of getting hurt. I'm a girl with a lot of baggage and I can't blame you if one day you decide to leave me alone because you're fed up with everything I put you through.

I'm fed up with myself too.
And if I were you, I'd hate me too.