Ad alteram partem mundi

Initium et finis

   Things could go wrong. Everything could go wrong. No matter how many times I repeat the- admittingly horrible and rushed- plan in my head, so many things could go wrong. This was by far the most dangerous and rushed mission I have ever been on. So many factors, so many things that relies on luck and sheer will. This was it though, this could either end exceptionally well or bad. One thing is certain though, the war was ending tonight. Sighing, I watch my breath swirl and disappear. The snow is softly falling, coating the world in a blanket of silence and mystery. The only thing keeping me sane is the sliver knife twisting in my hand, the soft swish of the metal sliding in my hand grounding me enough so I don't bolt. 

"Just get it over with. It's your job." my voice is soft and shaky. My nose burns from the cold air as I sat in the tree overlooking the castle. The castle is the biggest building in Derrin, endless corridors and doors would get anyone lost if they didn't grow up in the castle. The large stone walls are not for defenses, the queen thought people were smarter then to challenge her authority, guess not huh? The walls are decoration, the towers for boasting, the gardens, the towns, the throne room is all for showing off, not for defending a kingdom; unless Keria redecorated since I left. Highly doubt it though.

The wind rushes by, I raise my hand and block the ice bullets out of my eye. The snow on the trees limb moved and somehow found a way into my shoe. The moon, was the only light source on this stormy night. My cloak isn't doing much for protecting me from the cold. Shaking my head I look back at the looming castle. The tree I'm resting on isn't too far away from the castle but it isn't exactly close. The wind settled and a hush came over the forest.

"Now or never." Exhaling softly, I push off the tree branch and land onto the forest floor. Running through the snow usually would have brought back nice memories, of fun times and laughter but, so close to this wretched place, all the memories are sour and suffocating. I pick up the pace. My feet are barely touching the ground, I can see the castle walls getting closer. The turns practiced, memorized. The secret entrances familiar and sad. Scaling the wall was easy and perfect. Years of climbing these walls try to rear their head in but skillfully I shove them away, ignoring the lump of emotion in my throat. Later, focus too much at stake. I jump over the wall and into town square.

The town hasn't changed in the 18 years I've been gone. The same shops, the same festival posters hanging on the same walls. Taking my hood off, I stand in the square, watching the town sleep and the snow pile up. Chuckling, I shake the memories of shopping and training and walk forward, my feet crunching in the snow. The smell of cakes and bread overpower my nose as I walk by the bakery. The smell of wood makes me stagger as I walk past the wood keepers house. The small of burning metal and smoke make me look into the window as we past the iron smith's house.

 The castle is ahead, four guards standing by the drawbridge. Lightly flicking my finger on the handle of my knife I think about my options. I could kill the guards and walk through, but that's a lot of more people to kill if an alarm of some kind gets set off. I don't know the patrol routes anymore and I know Keria has changed those, she would be stupid to not; when I used to lead those. She probably doesn't have any guards patrolling close to the the entrance and there is a window leading into an easier route to get to her room. Nodding, I put my knife away and look up. Well here we go, remember the plan, don't freak out.

Rolling and cracking my neck I run to the side of the wall, jumping off the ground and using trees to jump above the wall pillars. Once both feet were on the ground, I sprint to the front of the castle were the window was placed. Quickly peaking in to make sure no one is patrolling the halls once I wait for a little bit to make sure to know the rounds of the guards. They pass the window every 85 seconds.

 Looking down at the guards which were a bit far away from me, were quietly talking about the recent celebration that just took past. I lightly tap the glass twice with my knuckle. Shit, it's thicker than I remember. Breaking it will cause a ruckus. Where is her balcony? Or just one in general? Shit, I'm pretty sure it's up a couple floors. I shiver as I look up, both from how exhausting this was going to be to climb and how hard the snow was coming down. Aspen is gonna kill me if i get out of here alive because I am gonna get a cold.

Rolling my shoulders to get the snow off and to loosen the muscles before pouncing onto the wall and climbing it. The stone is freezing cold,it's so cold that it almost burns. My fingers are shaking and turning a pale color. Grabbing onto the ledge of the windowsill, I hang my head and hiss through my gritted teeth before pushing of the wall and running to the left. I have to get inside soon, my fingers are starting to get warm. I see the balcony and have to hold back a laugh of joy. I almost slip when my fingers lock and I almost can't grab the wall tight enough.

Pulling myself up the railing I look at the door. I shake my hands, hoping to warm them a little before walking over to the door and looking in to make sure that Keria is sleeping. I see no one and hear no talking. I steel my nerves and get prepared for the worst before turning the doorknob. Nope, locked as to be expected. Taking out my knife,I break the lock and walk into the warm room. I let out a silent sigh of comfort as I feel my body start to warm up. I close the door behind me softly and  turn around and look at the person in the bed sleeping.

Keria's room hasn't changed a bit besides the old scrolls that where anywhere a roll of paper would fit. The wall has that same tapestry that is the same soft green and gold, the cold stone floor still has that stupid, old, worn carpet near the lit fireplace. Also near the fireplace is a chair and book shelve, both unkempt with books and dust covering them.  Nothing. Nothing has changed. Near the bed is a side table and and scrolls of paper. Keria is in her big, violet bed. Only her head is visible and occasionally she would hum in her sleep. 

The plan worked. She was completely out of it, I should thank Jasper when I get back, now having no doubts that I'll get caught. The worst part is over now for the...unfortunate part of my job. I sigh and rub my temple with my still shivering hand. Time to work.

My hands still burn, they're just waking up. I don't know how long Keria will stay asleep though, I have to get this done quickly. Throwing my knife in the air and catching it, I start to walk towards the bed. My boots would make tiny sloshing noises because of the melted snow. Stick to the plan. I walk until I'm next to her bed. I look down at her.

Years of childhood laughter and memories pushed themselves into my thoughts as I look down at her tired face. Years of being queen must be stressing even at such at a young age. Not the time. Focus. I raise the knife and finish the job.

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I can't go back yet. The snow is so heavy. I will die if I leave now I just started to be able to move my fingers without them aching. I'm shaking and this shaking isn't just because of the cold though. She didn't wake up, she stayed asleep during it all. Which while most of me is pissed I couldn't make her a suffer, a small 5 year old boy is happy that she died without feeling a thing.

I'm sitting next to the fireplace, watching the flames flicker while trying to warm up. Killing was a normal for me and only on the worst nights does it eat me up. It never goes away, the guilt or pain. No matter how much they deserve death. I bring up my hand to my scarred eye. This, this is why you don't hesitate. Losing my sight in showing mercy really beat it into me that you don't trust easily or hold back. I run my finger over the rough skin as I look out the window, and let out a soft laugh.

I did it. Derrin's war is over. Time for a new beginning.