Senses Failed

25

staring up at the ceiling, i laid in bed, her body closely beside me, mimicking me.

my thoughts keeping me company.

"bronx"

she moved her head to the side, turning to give me her attention.

"we should go somewhere " my imagination making constellations with the paint on the roof, "it's a been a lot, i just wanna-"

"get away"

"disappear" i corrected, "just for a little while"

she was silent, staring back up at the ceiling.

"whea ya wanna go?"

i shrugged, thinking, "when i was a little i always wanted to go to the mountains, i just always thought they were so beautiful."

she nodded.

"it's only a few hours out of the city and we'll only stay for a night" i pleaded to convince her.

"the trap"

"leave saint in charge" she laughed at my suggestion. "im sure he'd love to be boss for the day"

"yea" her voice going distant. "i'll talk to 'em"

propping myself up on my elbows, i looked down at her. "we don't have to go bronx, it was just a suggestion-"

"it ain't that ma" she got up, back facing me, sitting on her side of the bed, "ya know ya gonna kill me, right?"

my face scrunched up in confusion, "bronx what are you talking about?"

hurting her was the last thing on my mind.

"and ima let you" she let out a dry laugh, shaking her head,

"i ain't neva tell no one 'bout my moms, ain't neva bought a girl to my house" her elbows, leaned against her knees, her hand covering her mouth.

"when i seen you come into the club, i saw all your innocence, i saw hurt. something so beautiful was slowly starting to break down in front of my eyes"

sitting on my knees, i listened to her words.

"i saw everything in you that i use to be and i couldn't stand it-"

"bronx-" i interrupted.

"no let me finish, shepherd" i stayed silent, "i wanted you. not just for sex , i truly just wanted you, no" her back flexed as she shrugged her shoulders,

"i needed you and i didn't know why until a few day ago. honestly, you were the epitome of everything i hated but for some reason i couldn't stay away.

i thought  i could change you. turn you into the monster that my mom turned me into but even after everything, shepherd, i still see you the same."

my eyes shut at her words.

"this whole time, i thought, I could change you but really it's you who changed me, shepherd. and maybe God sent you to me-"

my eyes opened at the mention of that.

"i know it's probably to late for me but God has to be real, shepherd. to send me you, it has to be something. i didn't even think angels existed until i seen you. I can't shake the feeling that you were brought to me for reason."

moving closer to her, my arms wrapped her neck, my head laying on her shoulders.

"what are you saying bronx?"

turning her head slightly, her eyes casted down to me.

"im saying thank you" a full smile appearing on her beautiful face.

"for unintentionally being my light in a dark place."

a smile broke out onto my face, my cheeks burning.

"i love you, shepherd "

hearing those words, made my heart freeze, my body wouldn't react, she loved me.

pressing my lips against hers, she laid me on the bed, getting on top of me. her hands running through my hair.

my body yearning for her.

i pulled away causing her to groan.

"i love you too, bronx"

she smiled, starting to kiss me again.

my eyes, watching us in the ,large, mirror above her bed.

her lips moved to my throat, sucking on the spot that made me wet.

my lips brushed against her ear, whispering into them.

"but love is a dangerous thing, baby"