Senses Failed

4

"you better give them that baby." i yelled low enough for josie couldn't hear.

"im not giving them my baby." she yelled back, walking into the bathroom. "look i'll talk to rodney but as of now you have to go to the club with us, if they see i brought someone with me at least they'd know i wasn't backing' out of the deal."

"but you are."

she ran her fingers through her hair, "which i am but it'll spare us some time to come up with something."

"something like?" i sat on the bed not feeling the need to change or to even go out. i just wanted to tell josie, she'd know what to do and id be safe. i didn't trust nadiyah or rodney , they could barely trust each other.

"im not sure yet."

"what ?"

"look" she cams out the bathroom wearing black jeans and a white crop sweater. "i don't know but maybe we could come up with a pay plan."

"this is not the fucking bank, nadiyah." pushing past her to the door. "im gonna tell josie she'll know what to do."

she ran to the door slamming it. "you cannot tell her she'll kill me."

"at least it'll be you and not me."

pushing her aside, she moved back over to the door blocking my way. i could feel my anger rise inside me as my fist clenched and unclenched.

my nails digging deep into the skin of my palm, blood started to leak from the incision.

all i seen was black

and when i opened them, my hands were tightly around her throat, squeezing the little life out of her she thought she needed.

then my grandma's face came into view. she was yelling but my ears wouldn't allow me to hear her. nadiyah was playing with my life and it was fine if she wanted to fuck her shit up but she would not do the same to mine.

"remember what to do when someone makes you angry, shepherd." her hand rubbing up and down my thigh. "remember what you do."

my grip tightened, "fuck." letting her go as the face faded along with the memory. she fell to the ground gasping for air, grandma at her side.

"shepherd!" her glare meeting my dark eyes. "what's gotten into you? why are you two fighting?"

nadiyah met my eyes, hers begging me to not say anything.

"she took my shirt." i told her, sitting back down on the bed.

she stared at us as if we were crazy, shaking her head, she stood to her feet. "you girls are somethin' else ya hea me."

nadiyah stood up, holding her throat.

"you girls going out?" she stared at nadiyahs exposed skin.

raising a eyebrow to nadiyah i waited for her to speak.

"yea grandma." she laughed, sitting on the bed beside me, wrapping her arms around my shoulders. "im takin her somewhere nice right, shepherd?"

removing her arm, i wasn't about to lie to her. "we're going to that new club. we should be back before twelve, if not come looking for me." all seriousness laced in my voice.

nadiyah laughed uncomfortably from the bed, "she's always jokin', grandma."

she glanced from me to nadiyah then back to me again.

"y'all must think im stupid as hell." her hands on her hips, pacing the floor. "i don't know what's going on and im almost to afraid to ask but what i will say,nadiyah"

she opened the door staring at her stomach, "i smelled that baby long before you told, shepherd, start lookin' fa a job tomorrow." she left, closing the door behind her.

"great. now she knows."

i didn't want josie to know not because i wanted to protect nadiyahs secret but because if all else failed, she was gonna give them that damn baby. she didn't even want kids nor did she like them.

"im not giving my baby to them, shepherd."

walking closer to her, my hand placed itself gently on her arm, twisting it.

"shit!" she screamed, making me twist it more.

"you better hope everything runs smoothly because if it doesn't-"

"it will." she yelped in pain.

"because if it doesn't" i continued, "you will not have to worry about niggas from the south side hurting you."

the car horn honked from outside, letting us know they were here.

"i'll kill you myself."

snatching away from me, she grabbed her bag. "i thought the therapy was working for you."

pushing her aside, i opened the door, looking back at her. "it is."

we walked down the stairs, out the door, careful not to wake up josie as she slept on the couch.

i sat in the back with keith, nadiyah in the passenger seat as rodney drove down the street. "where's ryan?"

keith sucked his teeth,"that nigga was talkin stupid."

"too much of a liability, we had to leave his
ass home."

the car was filled with tension that only me and nadiyah felt.

"sooo" nadiyah started, "what do you think she wants?"

mentally i rolled my eyes, she had ten seconds to tell him before i did, my foot kicked her seat, she turned, glaring at me.

"i mean what do you think her motives are?"

rodney shrugged, eyes on the dark road. "she wants something." he stated, simply. "from me, someone around me, ryan? i don't know but ima find it out."

keith leaned up in his seat, "all we know is the bitch was lookin' fa somebody at the party and shootin' ryan was a message for someone, whoever it is."

she gulped from the front seat. "a message?"

"yea." rodney eyeing her change in demeanor. "as to say you ran out of time."

"but we ain't been fuckin with the south side since she took ova." keith admitted. "she may be a female but she a dangerous bitch."

she was quiet, too damn quiet.

"tell 'em, nadiyah."

"tell us what?" keith sat up lookin' between us.

rodney glanced from the road to her. "tell me what, bae?"

she was still quiet.

"bitch -!"

"i brought drugs from the south side and now they want their money, it's over a hundred grand and i told them id give them something in return for payment."

keith scrunched up his face, "you sellin' yo pussy to these, niggas?"

"no!" she yelled immediately making contact with rodney's angry eyes. "i told them id give them, shepherd."

"oh" keith looked towards me, "that's fucked up."

"look i know but we need to come up with a plan before we get there."

he shook his head parking, in a alley, "we ain't got a hundred grand."

she bit her lip, thinking. "maybe we can come up with something us."

rodney watched me through the rear view mirror.

"yea we can come up with something else." he told 'em.