Breaking Order

Chapter 5: "Feeling You"

I took a cleansing breath before exiting the elevator and stalking straight to Carbry's office. I mentally dared anyone to try and stop me as I put my hand on the door and shoved it open.

Car sat behind his desk, and upon seeing me, his expression betrayed his surprise. Idly, I noticed Eliza was there, too, sitting in front of his desk with a black folder in her lap. Apparently they'd been in a meeting. Well, tough titties. It was time for Car and I to chat.

When the other woman saw me standing there, dripping slightly muddied rainwater onto the ridiculously opulent carpet and shivering, she rolled her eyes and stood. "I suppose that'll be all for now, sir."

He nodded mutely, and she glared at me as she stalked out of the room, saying, "The call with the Head Order is in twenty minutes" before closing the door behind her.

Car opened his mouth to speak, but before he could I pointed at him, "Shut it, asshole."

He closed his mouth and regarded me confusedly as I spoke, "Look, I don't know what you expected me to do when I agreed to be your...whatever I am-"

"Mate" he offered.

"I said shut it!" He followed my command, expression serious.

I kept going, "I know you thought I'd be some damsel in distress or a princess locked up in the keep or some shit when I came back here."

He stood then, expression indicating he had a lot to say about my comments, but I held up my hand. He promptly closed his mouth. "I will not be that." I finished emphatically.

Tirade complete, I stopped speaking, breathing heavily as I narrowed my gaze, waiting for him to say something. When he didn't, I practically yelled, "Say something." The exasperation in my voice was palpable.

He looked confused, "You told me not to speak."

I frowned, "Well, speak now."

He offered me a deep look as he addressed me, "Meri, of course that isn't what I expected of you. I love you. I know you'd never be happy like that."

I frowned, "Then why did you sound like you were going to tell me to give everything up?"

He came around the desk slowly, as if he were worried about frightening me. Rather than walking up to me, he stood there, staring before finally replying, "Mer, I was only going to suggest that you go back to working with Timothy on rogue hunting. I'd be less worried knowing you're going out there with our people and not on your own for things."

My frown deepened, but he quickly added, "But if that isn't want you want, then we'll find a way to make it work."

"I.." I faltered, "I thought you were going to.." I trailed off as Car started approaching me slowly.

"You thought I'd try to tell you what to do, that I'd try to control you." I looked down at the ground and nodded silently.

I saw his feet stop right in front of me, and he reached out to grab my hand with obvious trepidation, "I wouldn't do that to you, mo shíorghrá." I looked at him then, his blue-eyed gaze penetrating my soul as he continued speaking, "I-I'm sorry about earlier. I should have tried harder to clarify."

For some reason, I started to tear up, but I angrily wiped my eyes before anything embarrassing could happen.

When neither of us said anything immediately, he finally broke the silence, "You're cold." Primarily because I didn't want to look silly if I got emotional and knowing speaking would make me emotional, I didn't say or do anything in response.

Regardless, he slipped off his ridiculously expensive suit jacket and put it around my shoulders anyway. Because I was cold, I didn't protest.

Not liking the confusion I felt, I frowned but moved closer to him anyway. I didn't look at his face and instead put my head on his chest. Taking that as permission, he hugged me close before I finally spoke, feeling my damp hair seeping into his shirt as I did, "I'm sorry I ruined your carpet. I thought I was mostly dry."

He snorted before I continued, quieter this time, "And...and I'm sorry I didn't stay to talk before leaving."

He rested his chin on the top of my head. "It's OK, Meri."

This time, he gave a very long pause before speaking softly, "Part of me worried you wouldn't come back."

"But you didn't send your minions after me even though you were worried..."

I felt him shrug against me. "Of course not. You told me not to."

I smiled before crushing myself closer to him. During my sulking time in the woods, the wind had kindly coated me in a thin layer of mud. I was probably ruining his white dress shirt.

"I'm ruining your clothes."

He laughed, "You're always welcome to destroy my clothing as long as it means you keep coming home."

I smiled, ducking my head deeper to hide my grin. "Don't you have a conference call with the Head Order or something?"

I felt him shrug. "Yeah, it starts...." He removed his left arm and checked his watch "...five minutes ago."

He returned his arm to its place around me then kissed the top of my head. "I'll tell them I was sick."

I snorted, pulling back so that I could look at him. "Think they'll buy it?"

He grinned. "Not a chance."

Looking down, I noticed that I had, in fact, ruined his shirt with my mud and a emotional tears that had managed to escape. Catching me staring at his chest, he looked down then grinned when he saw the muddy stain. 

"Totally worth it," he said with a smirk.

In return, I smiled back. It was totally worth it.