"Help, I've Lost Myself Again."

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Billie P.O.V.

When she finally fell asleep I cleaned her arms and wrapped it up in a guaze. I changed her wet clothes into some new ones and put her in her bed to lay down in. She was so hurt back there. 

"You don't deserve any of this.", I said in a whisper. 

When I left her room I called Dani and asked her to come over to my house when i was finished with Hartly . While I was waiting for Hartly to wake up. I decided to look around her house. It was painted with a mix of blue and purple. It's kind of ironic, I was going to dye my hair the exact same colour. She really nice decore and furniture. When I was finished I decided to post a picture on instagram. 

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billieeilish "Help, I've Lost Myself Again."


Weird. Hartly just liked it that must mean she's awake. As I was walking up the stairs I got a notification on my phone. 

therealhartlymartinezz now follows you. 

"Hartly?", I said when I knocked on the door.

"Yea."

"Can I come in to talk about earlier?"

"Sure."


"Hartly. I think you need to go to therapy to help with... umm.. everything you said in the bathroom."

"I don't know Billie. I'm fine. Like i seriously fine."

"Hartly, your not fine. Stop lying to yourself it will only get worse. Please just listen to me before you go back to cutting your arms again. Trust me. I used to do it too. The therapy helped me. Please just consider it before I leave. Ok?"

"Sure."

Hartly P.O.V.

After Billie left I thought about it. Therapy? Mother Fucking Therapy. I mean she has a point, but I don't know if it would be good. I mean it already is hard enough for me to go to sleep at night. I keep seeing when he was shot and the person who shot him. Then there's all these people saying:

YOUR SUCH A FUCKING IDIOT YOU DIDN'T EVEN HELP HIM. 

YOU WIMP YOU JUST STOOD THERE FROZEN

WHAT YOU THINK JUST WATCHING IS GONNA HELP HIM 

YOUR THE REASON WHY HE'S DEAD 

YOUR THE REASON WHY HE'S DEAD 

YOU FUCKING KILLED YOUR BEST FRIEND

I started crying again I couldn't take it anymore I'm pretty sure I need to see a therapist. So I decided that tomorrow I will call Danielle to bring Billie tomorrow so we can talk about therapist I could see since she said it helped her when she used to cut.  

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