On Monday morning, I slowly make my way to homeroom, not in any rush to face Sophia. I mean how awkward would that be? I wait until the absolute last second to linger at my locker, until the warning bell rings.
I take my usual seat next to her, and I see her nose in a book, as usual. "Hey," I say. "Hi." She doesn't even look at me. I bite the inside of my cheek. "So, um, Kendall told me about how you like..you know who..and I-" She slams the book shut, apparently her way of telling me to shut up.
"Look Lilia, as long as you don't like him back, there's nothing to get mad over." I gulp as she says this. "Well, uh, the thing is..we're..dating now.." I spit out the last part like its word vomit, just to get it over with.
I start to chip my baby blue nail polish nervously, waiting for her to say something. Anything. I look up slowly, to see her face red as a tomato and her hands clenched into fists. "Soph?" I whisper. "How could you do this? You're pathetic; going after the only guy that I have feelings for." That's all she has time to tell me before the bell rings, but it's surely enough to make me hate myself more than usual.
****
I fight back tears as I power walk down the hall to my Bio class, hardly realizing that I had passed Connor on my mission to get to class so I wouldn't freak out. "Lil? What's wrong? You look like you might explode," he says cautiously.
I sniffle obnoxiously, not meaning to. "Sophia hates me," I blurt out. He looks puzzled. "What, why?" My chin wobbles, and I decide that I can't possibly get into this without bawling my eyes out. "Look, let's not talk about this now. I'll see you in lunch," my voice cracks as I say this, and I can already feel hot tears in my eyes, threatening to start streaming down my face.
He looks completely confused, but says, "No one can ever hate you, Lil. You're an amazing person. Whatever happened, I'm sure that it will blow over." Him saying this without even knowing what was happening makes me want to cry even more, for some reason.
I stand on my tip-toes and peck him on the lips. "Thank you," I whisper into his ear.
****
The next four periods drag on for what seems like an eternity, but those are Mondays for you. And they seem to go by even slower when your best friend hates you. When it's time for English, I run over to Kendall and tell her what happened in homeroom.
"She said that?" She sputters, completely appalled. "Yeah, and I only found out that she liked him yesterday! And not to be rude, but Connor doesn't like her like that and probably never will!" It comes out harsher than intended, but sometimes the truth hurts.
"I'm going to try to talk to her later," she assures me. "Losing a friendship over a guy isn't worth it." She got that right. "Thanks Ken." I lean over and hug her, thankful to have someone on my side.
****
By the time lunch rolls around, I sit at the usual table with Connor, not ready to explain the situation with Sophia. I mean was I supposed to tell him about her crush on him? I wanted to respect her privacy, but after the way she treated me this morning, I was so enraged that I really didn't care.
"Hey," he says carefully, as if he was scared that I was going to burst into tears. Although, I wouldn't be surprised if I was. I take a deep breath and just spill everything that happened, like ripping off a Band-Aid.
His eyes practically bug out of his head when I tell him that; A. Sophia likes him, and B. What she said to me in homeroom. "What a fucking bitch," he says. "Who does she think she is, talking to her best friend like that?" I shrug. "I'd like to know, too."
He puts his arm around me, which seems weird at first, but I get used to it quickly. "Don't worry, Lil. She'll come around; and if she doesn't, and wants to hold a grudge over stupid middle school drama, it's her loss. Don't let this rattle you, okay?" He kisses me on my forehead.
"Why do you always know what to say?" I ask rhetorically. "Because I know you," he says simply. "Oh, and good news! I don't have to go to the dentist until sometime next week!" He adds excitedly. I smile. "That's awesome! How come your Mom changed the appointment again?" I ask curiously. "Oh, she doesn't want me to lose like three days of school because I'll be in so much pain, and it's still Monday," he explains. "So now it's most likely going to be next Thursday or Friday so I'll have the weekend to..recover I suppose you can say," he laughs. "Well, it doesn't matter, I'll be there anyway," I assure him, giving him a hug.
He smiles gratefully. "Now let's go get lunch." He now says, changing the subject. "What do you want?" He asks me. Water, I think to myself. I shake my head. "Nothing for me, this whole situation is making my stomach churn," which isn't a complete lie.
He sighs, and walks away towards the lunch line, not looking convinced with my response. Oh well.
****
By the time I get home, I decide I'm too physically and emotionally tired to deal with anything else, so I put on comfy clothing and crawl into bed. I was so relieved I didn't have to go to the dentist with Connor today; instead I got to sleep. I start to doze off when Vanessa bursts into my room, nearly giving me a heart attack.
I sit up, still disheveled, and glance at her face. "V? Why are you crying?" I get out of bed and pull up the shades. All of a sudden she starts sobbing. "V what the hell is going on?!" I start to panic now.
"Mom.." she sputters. "Dad..accident.." she's choking on the words as she tries to speak. Accident? What fucking accident? "Vanessa! Tell me what the fuck happened!" I screech. "Mom and Dad were in a car accident God dammit! Now they're in the fucking hospital!" She begins to bawl again before I have a second to react.
I feel my knees weaken. Without realizing it, tears were already pouring out of my eyes like a broken faucet. "Are they okay?!" I spit out. She shrugs, her whole body being taken over by her trembling sobs.
"I..I just got a call like ten minutes from a nurse at the hospital telling me they were brought there after the accident. I don't know what to expect!" She exclaims. By the way she was reacting, it was clear she was already assuming the worst. With my hands trembling, I pick up my phone and dial my Aunt's cell number.
After choking out what happened, my Aunt tells me she's on our way to pick us up, and that she was going to call the hospital, so we could find out when we can go see them.
After I hang up, I drop my phone on the floor, unwillingly, and crumble to the ground, next to Vanessa. We cry and hug each other until our Aunt pulls into the driveway.
I didn't know how much more I could handle until I snapped like a twig. it felt like I was losing everyone.
YOU ARE READING
Living with Ana
Teen Fiction"Society seems to think doing this to teenage girls is okay, but it really isn’t. It was society who taught me that I wasn’t good enough, that it would be so hard to love myself. It all started when I was hardly thirteen. Barely old to enough to rea...
