The innocent bride and her dangerous lover (completed)

chapter 11

Have you been broken in a way that you could not understand how to mend yourself ?

i bearly slept for 2 hours last night . After offering prayer i slept but my nightmare woke me up and after that i could not sleep.

Flahback :

I was sitting in my room , my own home with my head in my mothers lap and she was moving her fingers in my head . it was so peaceful and i was happy being near to her. but suddenly the door of my room opened and xavier entered...... he was so angry, i quickly got up from my mother lap and stood up straight . xavier pulled out a gun from his back and shot my mother straight in her heart i was covered in her blood ...my mother's blood "i told you if you run away from me , from  this marriage i will kill your family " and he dragged me out with him but when i looked back my mother , brothers , sister in laws and nephews and nieces were all lying covered in blood "

end of flash back

suddenly i got up with heavey breath tears on my cheeks i was soo alone their was so darkness in this room , i was never scared of dark but this dark was scaring me to my death .

I qucikly got up and switched on the light I offered two rakat nafal aand did tahajud and recited quran but .... my tears did not want to stop i cried whole night .

I sat in the window that was in the room and was lost in my thoughts about my family how would they be , how my mother would be. I never had close friends or relation with any one except my mother she was my universe without her i was nothing .

This was the first time i was far away from her and i don,t even know if she is ok or not how would she be had she had any dinner or lunch or had she had slept or not ?

all these things were in my mind but i could do nothing to resolve them i was so helpless.

Morning came and when i offfered my prayer and were complaining Allah  for my condition.
"why Allah why, Was i that bad that you gave me this severe punishment that you made me married to a killer " a sob escaped my mouth

Tears were falling like they had never came out of my eyes " why Allah you ruined  me, why you ruined my family , my mom she ..ya Allah it hurts alot " and i cried alot my hijab was wet with my tears.

In the mean time i remembered what happened between us last night why i felt comfort in his embrace how he controlled my attack when he was the reason for it why .

Why particularly now on this  prayer mat  in this situation of dua God made me remember that scene "what are you trying to show me , what you want  to say Allah "

i don,t know for how long i was sitting there but i came in my senses when someone knocked on my door at exact 8 ,i didn,t said anything but the knocking came again i stood up and folded the prayer mat .

i went towards the door and opened it an elderly women was standing at the door i don,t know who she is what she wants but she answered my questions

" good morning you must be Mrs xavier right"

i don,t know what to say

"well i mean larib right " i just nodded beacuse i don,t know what to do " well darling welcome  i am lucy but you can call me ma , xavier is on breakfast table and he is waiting for you for the breakfast ."

"what breakfast .... xavier ... waiting wis he serious  due that idiot my sleep and hunger all are lost and he is waiting for me for breakfast. " i thought in my mind."

"hmmm i am.... not feeling hungry so please excuse me will you " i said politely

"but darling you had nothing from yesterday "