Counting Steps

P O I S O N E D

    You annoy me. I know exactly why, just maybe not completely.

I look at you and I see everything I'm not to you. Everything I am doesn't exist in your eyes. When I'm near you your doubts swim behind my eyes and I'm left with burning ones, crying in the bathroom alone.

I wish you knew why I don't tell you things. You said I could come to you for anything while lying between your teeth.

Your lies coat my tongue in thick layers of mistrust.

My pain, my issues, my happiness, they mean nothing to you. Nothing except your false concepts and empty promises.

You left me as soon as I came around. As soon as I trusted you, cried inside of your head, you put something up that locked me out of your love.

But I've grown thicker skin since you first hurt me. Every day that I'm with you I feel myself hardening more and more to your words.

I'm growing more immune to your poison every time you speak the name I forbade to leave your mouth.

It enters my bloodstream and courses through my veins. But I learned to stay away from your arouma. I hold my breathe around you.

But sometimes I swear to god all I want to do is breathe it in. Because I love you. You're my family. But you have nothing to give and I've taken all I could.

Which was clearly only poison.