Crashing Into You

What. Is. Happening.

Meg shouts and jumps off Max.

"Em, I-" Max starts to speak.

"Save it." I cut Max off, the tears didn't come like I thought they would. Did I still after all of this time not love him like I should have? I though we were doing great. I thought the life we had was what he wanted? Can I even be mad at this? I had sex with Jeff...on our wedding day.

"Emma. What just-" It was Megs turn to try and talk.

"Get out please, Meg. Can we talk about this later? I have somethings I need to talk about with my husband." I made sure I sounded out the last word. How could she? Wasn't she the one to be so supportive of Max and I from the beginning? I'm so confused with this whole situation. How was my life perfect this morning and now I can't even recognize this mess.

Meg looks at Max.

"No need to get his permission, he will see you later." I don't even have the energy right now.

Meg looks at me with tears in her eyes as she walks out of the door.

"Em, Im leaving you for Meg." Max's once swoon worthy voice makes me look up.

"I gathered that one, asshat. But listen, can we just talk about that later? I have something we need to talk about." I can't even hear my own voice without hearing an echo. Was this a dream?

"Alex is Jeff's."

That made me look up to meet his eyes. "Yes, but-"

"Why have you let me live in an unloving marriage for 2 years? Why not just have left me? Better yet, why even marry me?!" He was angry, I get it.

"You don't get to be angry! I just walked in on you about to have sex, in OUR bed with MY best friend."
There you are, give him hell.

"You-"

I couldn't hear this anymore. "Max, I have cancer. And if I don't get treatment I have a year to live."

All he did was look at me, his eyes burning into my soul. He looked like he had mixed feelings. He was angry, sad, hurt, mad.

"I can help with Alex if you need me too. I have loved you a long time so I'll help. But this isn't going to make me stay with you. Sounds like you deserve this. Marrying someone that you don't love for selfish reasons. Karma is a bitch isn't it?" What? How is this my fault?

"Get. The. Fuck. Out. I won't be needing your help with Alex."

Max gets up and grabs the already packed bag, he must have planned on leaving tonight.

As soon as I hear the front door slam I get on the floor and scream cry. What. Is. Happening. The tears slow down and my breathing gets heavy. I close my eyes to help with the pain in my heart and stomach. I slowly sink into the darkness of sleep.

Dream:

I was walking down the halls of our high school heading towards the cafeteria, following the crowd. Here I am senior year. I spent the summer losing some weight and actually taking care of myself. I tried out for cheerleading over the summer as well. Everyone one at tryouts was shocked to see me and even more shocked when I did the routine they had made us practice. I got my acceptance letter to the the squad, the same days as tryouts.

I was proud of my uniform. If you were any type of athlete, you were supposed to wear your uniform the first day of school. So here I am, getting attention from people who have known me all three years and not even looked twice.

I walk in the cafeteria, immediately I see Meg started waving her hand vigorously trying to get my attention. She was sitting with Max, Jeff and their squad. They both had their eyes on me, mouths slightly opened. I internally groan as I confidently walk to the table. Max and Jeff both scoot their bodies to make room for me to sit.

Hm...who to sit next to? They were both on opposite sides of the table. In a split second decision I sit next to Max. He slings his arm over my arms, "Have you always been this cute?"

"Nope, looks like she lost weight and became a cheerleader over the summer." Jeff answers for me, did he just roll his eyes?

I send him a death glare and smile at Max. Jeff gets up and leaves the cafeteria, slamming the door as he leaves.

"Woah, what crawled up his ass?" Max asked.

"I don't know, are we still on for a movie tonight?" Meg asks Max.

"Uh, sure. Em you wanna join us?"

Meg sends me a don't- you-dare look.

"No I got stuff I need to get done. Thank you though." I really wanted to go but I wasn't gonna ruin anything.

"Ok well I need your number. Maybe we can go see a movie next time." Max is bold, I like it.

I can't believe this is happening. I loved this boy in middle school. He has always been so sweet to me but never interested.

"Sure." I hand him a piece of paper and walk out, not wanting to see Megs reaction.

I walk out of the cafeteria and head to my next class. It was in E building which was the farthest from the cafeteria and I didn't wanna be late.

I feel a slight tug at my wrist and and two arms pull me into a hug. Before I can react, I hear Jeff's sultry voice, "Why did you sit next to Max and not me?"

I jolt awake. I'm no stranger to Jeff-dreams. But I couldn't help but think what if I had sat next to Jeff that day?

I looked at the clock. 4:00. Shoot, I need to go get my baby. And then when I get home I'll have to start packing for Motif.

Goan. I gotta call my mom. Maybe Alex can stay with her.