In All Her Glory

•09: In Tension•

|Chapter Nine|

Sharon's POV

Wearily, I shut my eyes tightly, but the image behind them wouldn't go away. Opening them again, I instead put in all my efforts into running. My two legs trying to outdo one another, I reached the bench in front of the only amusement park in the estate. My body collapsed onto the non-living thing like it held the solution to my many problems.

Over two months since leaving home so ungracefully, and there was not even an inch of progress. Nightmares every night, anger every day. Despite my smiling around Dami and the guys, once I got alone at night, it was back. The despair and loneliness. The guilt. The self-hatred. The anger.

At least, you're not being forced into intercourse almost every night.

That was true. Even if that was the only change in my life, I should be grateful. No beast was laying his scaly fingers on my tortured skin every night. I gagged as images flashed unbidden in my eyes. Throat coiling wrath tightened my airways and made me want to taste blood.

Mayowa had not only destroyed my life, he had turned me into a monster as well. I so wanted to die in this moment. I had no purpose for living.

I dragged myself from the bench my body lay on and did what I thought best for me. I took myself to the road and waited. And waited. And waited.

"Gahh!" I screamed from deep within my soul. Tears like waterfalls ran down my face in a rush, blurring my sight effectively. Pain ricocheted through my veins at how desperate I was for this to happen.

But no vehicle was coming at all. How could there be no cars for almost thirty minutes?

God, You know You and I don't relate, but will You do me a favour and kill me?! I'm freaking tired! I don't want to live anymore.

Now, I was full-on weeping. I could feel mucus flowing from my nostrils, and I didn't care. It was the last thing on my mind; my appearance. I just wanted out from this world so I wouldn't have an appearance.

Like continuous, unending reels, last night's bad dream was on repeat in my head and I was so tired of it all. If only there was a knife or a blade around me...

Frantic, I wiped my hands over my eyes in an attempt to clear them. My tears halted on their own accord. I glanced around. Only my phone sat on the bench I had evacuated earlier. I glared at it. If I were near it, I'd have flung it away for being so useless to me when I need it to be a life saver right now.

The irony would be that it'd kill me, but it would be saving me also. I could imagine being an unfeeling spirit. Exactly what I desired.

I should get back to the house now. The solution is there.

The next thing I knew, I was jogging in the direction in which I'd come. Everything was a blur around me as my mind could only view one thing. The spot where the knives in my late grandma's kitchen hung.

Desperation and a strange eagerness fueled my running.

It was then that I heard the heavy footsteps hitting the gravel behind me at a regular pace.

"Hey!"

I have no time for you!

God only knew how to do wicked things to people, so I was sure He had heard my cry to Him to kill me. Which led me to wonder why someone was trying to delay my awaiting suicide.

It's not suicide, a dark voice retorted. It's relief.

"Sharon?" The unrelenting loud voice called. The sound of their quick, heavy breathing grated seriously on my nerves. No matter how much I tried to outrun this person, they were gaining on me. Fast.