13 (unedited)

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Thirteen is supposed to be unlucky. I was born on the 13th of January. For me, that seems to be the most unlucky. Remembering how I've always just wished I was never born. That hits wrong, I realize that. Even though I acknowledge that and I know how you must feel, if you know me, hearing that but somehow I'm not sorry. You say to me, "No!" and I understand why. I love you for that, although that doesn't make the feeling go away. Your concern will not make the desire lessen. I'm sorry, I don't wanna make you cry, because darling I love you and I really do wanna die. I know that you love me and you will be sad if I leave. I just don't think I can be here anymore. I want to escape I need to run away. There is not any single reason for why I want to leave. I had lots of love that everyone has given me. I just want to get away and go far away, so far that I don't exist anymore.

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