Like We Never Loved At All
Lyrics
You never looked so good
As you did last night
Underneath the city lights
There, walking with your friend
Laughing at the moon
I swear you looked right through me
But I'm still living with your goodbye
And you're just going on with your life
How can you just walk on by
Without one tear in your eye?
Don't you have the slightest feelings left for me?
Maybe that's just your way
Of dealing with the pain
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall
Like we never loved at all
You, I hear you're doing fine
Seems like you're doing well
As far as I can tell
Time is leaving us behind
Another week has passed
And still I haven't laughed yet
So tell me
What your secret is
(I wanna know, I wanna know, I wanna know)
To letting go, letting go like you did
Like you did Like you did
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We were drawn into the abyss, no one else existed on this very busy street, but the two of us. This is us. Me yearning for him and him yea....... Does he feel it, the draw of my heart? Did he feel my presence like I instinctively felt him? Something within me reacted to his energy before I even saw him. As if a storm was brewing, without a cloud in the sky, all electric and tingling. A quick nod proves he recognizes me from this distance. I tilt my chin.
I'm bumped from behind, and he leans into my ear from above whispering, " Come on, Cagri is waiting." Taking my arm, leading me to the car but before I get in, I briefly glance over my shoulder toward the Café and, getting control of this situation, look across the roof of the car and laugh at Tarik.
...........................................................
Can didn't miss any of it. He had taken a casual stance in the chair, resting against the back, but every muscle in his body wanted to react. Controlled effort fighting primal urge. Tarik? What the hell just happened?
Faruk was back and making inadequate small talk over breakfast. It never occurred to him that he didn't have my full attention. "Your travels will open doors that you could never imagine, possibly everything you could have ever dreamed about." I highly doubt he even knows my dreams and would probably be shocked if he knew the real reason I sought international fame. "Oh, this business is tough but with proper guidance you will be on every magazine cover and at the top of every TV rating, Mark my words." More likely more gossip rags and EK was already at the top of the rating charts before it was canceled! "You don't want to pass up this opportunity like others we know." Eyebrows raised, smirk in place, "I have it on good authority that Demet has thrown herself into her new project and her "new partner" has Netflix aspirations. We shall see." A doubtful look as he stuffed his last bite into his mouth.
I have to get out of here! I'm going to lose it! I can only play disinterest for so long! "Um, Faruk. I'm needing to run. I have a workout with Umut on my agenda in less than 15 minutes. Please excuse me." Pushing back from the table, I grip the arms of my chair in an effort to flex my hands that have been fisted for the past half hour. Faruk raises and leans in as if to hug me, I shake his hand instead and all but sprint out.
Barely making it to the alley on the right of the cafe, I duck in. Shaking, covered in a light sheen of sweat, I'm feeling sick! Not from last nights bourbon or even Faruk's estimation of what is going on in her life. All this reaction is due to her brushing me off. Callously, denying our souls. Forcing the wedge between us just a little more into place. Is this what we have become, a nod or recognition? Like we never loved at all.
.........................................................
Breath Demet! In 1.2.3. Out 1.2.3. In 1,2, "Demet? Was that Can!" I slowly open my eyes, "No. It wasn't." Not sure if Tarik believed, he had at least seen part of my reaction, but not really caring at the moment because I couldn't collect a coherent thought other than Him.
He looked tired. I could even see it from that distance. But oh my heart, he looked like my Can. His hair a bit more unkept, beard a little more full, but still my Can. My heart had come to a complete stop, and only began again for him. The smallest fragment of hope, in the deepest recess of my soul wanted to flourish but his nod doused that soon enough. Ironically, looks can be deceiving. He wasn't her Can after all.
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Thanks for reading y'all!
I'm old! Ive been married 30 years and have two grown children, both married and one grandchild. I'm telling you this to list experience because what I have to say now, Ive lived it and told both of my kids, even at a young age, many times.
"DONT PASS UP CHANCES! The only regrets are missed opportunities. Be their champion, hold their hand for every occasion and most importantly ALWAYS TELL THEM YOU LOVE THEM!"
Shew! All the angst is hard on this woman!
As promised, Rigel DeSilva, or @rigelds3, was the first to comment accurately about the direction of the storyline! Yeah girl! Thanks for your insight!
The Lyrics posted above are from a Faith Hill/Tim McGraw song (my best friend's favorite performers). I usually wouldn't take her advise as she hasn't even attempted to watch EK but when I listened to the song and watched the video, I was amazed at how well it fit.
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