Mingkit; To Begin Again

Seven

Heavy rain. Soaked head to toe, shivering, praying for the pain to ease.

It never does. It never goes. 

He's barely breathing and it's the only comfort. Hit the rock bottom, you want to be dead.

Because if he was dead he would stop hurting. He has hold on for so long.

You need to live, you can choose to live. He didn't. You need to stay and you need to be strong.

His own existence pains him, all the memories that he can't erase plying in his head fast forward. Anything good that ever happened, that could make him smile, follows with the fact that it's never happening again. 

It would've been better to never exist at all. 

Ming lays on the muddy ground, next to his grave. He knew this was going to happen. Later or sooner he would've had to come here and let the crushing reality slap itself on Ming's face.

--

He has never ran this fast and despite his heart beat being close to a heart attack, he keeps going. Adrenaline keeps his mind focused as he jumps over a puddle on the gateway to the graveyard. 

"Ming!" he screams and looks around. It's dark, only few weak lanterns lighting up a pathway deeper into the graveyard. "Ming!" 

He doesn't know why Ming is here but he knows something is wrong. It's just a gut feeling. 

He runs around, between the tombs. After a great time of running around as he stops to catch his breath, his eyes meet a person laying on the ground. 

His heart jumps as he freezes, looking around trying to find someone who can help.

But there's nobody. 

"M-ming?" Kit says, voice shivering out of fear. What if he's... dead?

He kneels down next to him, with shaking hands he shakes the lifeless body. A terrified noise leaves Kit's mouth as he recognizes Ming's emotionless face.

"Wake up," words barely had a sound on them. He's shaking Ming's body but get's no response. He doesn't realize his tears streaming down, getting mixed with raindrops. "Ming you need to wake up," Kit says with a tiny voice full of despair and grabs his head to embrace it closer. 

He holds Ming's cold body in a heavy rain on a dark graveyard praying in his mind.

As he's holding him, Ming starts coughing.

"Ming? Can you hear me?" Kit asks, trying to protect him from the rain. Ming mumbles, unsure how and when Kit found him. He was waiting for his last breath. 

"Kit..." he says quietly, voice full of pain. 

"Yes? What is it?" Kit looks at the pale face with eyes that fight to stay half open. 

"I.. I don't want this life no more," Ming whispers. World feels hazy as his eyes close. Kit shakes his head. 

"Ming don't say that," he keeps shaking his head. Carefully he moves Ming's hair off his face and dries his cheeks from rain. "Please Ming, I promise you this life doesn't have to be what it is," Kit continues and keeps stroking Ming's hair, barely seeing anything through his teary eyes.

"I'll do anything to see you happy okay? I'm going to help you. So don't worry, okay?" 

Kit smiles a bit as he sees a slight change on Ming's face. As if a tiny slice of the pain flew away from his body. "Everything's gonna be okay."

--

Green grass, right after a summer rain was the best thing Ming knew. Since his childhood, his mother always took him outside after the rain. The smell is familiar and fresh, makes him smile. 

Another thing that makes him smile, happy over the moon, is his lover. It feels like they're kids again and there's not a worry of the world. 

Holding hands as they lay on the rainy grass, looking at each other. Peaceful.

As he's looking at his eyes, out of nowhere dark thick blood starts to fall down from his mouth. A cough and he's laying on the ground. 

Ming was always calm. But after seeing this, panic sets in. In the blink of an eye, he's looking at him inside the coffin. "No! No, no!" he's screaming.

"No! Please no," Ming mumbles and shakes his head. Kit sits next to him, taking his hand on his own. His heart breaks as he sees how rough Ming's life is even on his sleep. Even on his sleep bad events follow him. 

"Ming," Kit says, gathering up all his courage to wake him up. Ming's body is twisting around and muffled lamentation leaving his mouth, until he throws himself to sit. 

Kit looks at Ming, who's sweating and looking around in confusion. After a deep breath, Ming collapses on Kit's shoulder. 

He has no idea how he ended up at Kit's apartment, but he's relieved. 

"Ming, your body is burning," Kit says and pushes him back to the bed. As he places a cold towel on his forehead, their eyes meet. "Kit.. I've caused trouble again," Ming whispers and closes his eyes. That's all he does anymore. Kit shakes his head and smiles. 

"It doesn't matter if you've got someone who takes the aftermath," Kit tells him and before he has time to stand up, Ming has grabbed his arm. "Stay here," he says. Kit bites his own lip before sitting back. "If I told you.. about a noise inside my head," Ming starts and tries to sit, stopped by Kit. 

"I know that noise, it's not there to stay," Kit says and takes Ming's hand, squeezing it a little. Ming smiles weakly. 

"You know, this helps.. you, when I'm around you this noise disturbs me less," Ming whispers, keeping his eyes closed. Kit feels his heart beat slightly faster as he hears those words. 

"Then I'll be here until there's no noise at all," he answers, unsure what he's stepping into.

If Kit can do something good, he believes there's a deeper meaning to it. Whatever it is, he won't let this troubled soul be alone with those noises another day.