Dressed For Slaughter

Anxiety

Chapter 3: anxiety
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Ever since the murder Vincent had been avoiding me. We've been in a lot of arguments and honestly if I was him... I would be mad at me too. But the lack of remorse that fills me prevents me from feeling bad about it. I know what I did was wrong, but... it was fun I'll admit to it. You can call me crazy, deranged, psycho, insane, whatever your word for it is, it's all the same, and it is me, it's who I've been really ever since I started understanding everyone. Before my wife died she always set up physiatrists for me, had me put on a lot of medication to control what's wrong with me. I know she was trying to help but I hated her for doing that. I asked her if she thought I was crazy once I'd found out what she was doing, she replied with no... but I didn't believe her. I'm not crazy... I just have a hard time understanding emotions and usually act out on bold disinhibited choices, it all ties in together. They all say that I'm sick... that I need to be put away, locked up to never see the light of day, but that would just make a man crazier, even if you thought he was at the brink of insanity. I paced around the back room of Fredbear's, surrounded by the suits that contained the children. I kept thinking, thinking of what would happen if I was caught, then a voice broke through my thoughts, "They all know what you did..." I looked around searching for whom ever spoke. I didn't say anything, I merely stood there, waiting to hear it again. "They know, they'll find you, and you'll be put away, right where you belong." The voice was clearer now, it was the voice of Michael. Impossible, I thought. How could that be Michael, he's dead! "It's only a matter of time..." The voice was closer, I quickly ran for the door, running out to the stage, hiding behind the curtain. "It's got to be your schizophrenia acting up..." I said to myself quickly. Though I was out of the room I could still hear them, their shrieks and cries for help, telling me it's my fault. I had to leave. I closed the pizzeria for the rest of the night and went home. No matter how far I was, the voices continued. I got home and pulled into the garage, running for the front door. I opened it quickly and ran inside just as Michael was coming downstairs. "Is everything alright father?" Michael asked worriedly, "NothevoicesMichael,they'refollowingme!" "Father you have to slow when you speak, otherwise I can't tell what's wrong." Michael stepped closer to me and was trying to calm me down. I was starting to hyperventilate and Michael knew what was going on. He rushed towards the bathroom to retrieve my medication. I held onto the wall to balance myself from falling, I knew what was going on, I was having an anxiety attack. Michael came back and handed me my medicine and a glass of water, I took it and tried not dropping it because of how badly I was trembling. After I took my medication Michael helped me upstairs to my room and sat down next to me, making sure I was going to be alright. I started calming down and the voices already faded I looked towards Michael, and hugged him, "Thank you Michael..." I said gratefully. "You're welcome, now tell me what happened." Michael looked at me concerned. "It started at the pizzeria... I was in the back room fixing up the Fredbear and friends suits... and then that's when I heard the voices..." Michael looked at me strangely, "What did the voices say?" He asked. "I-." I stopped myself. William if you tell him what they said, he'll get suspicious, he'll know what I did, "I don't remember..." I lied. Michael shook his head, "Sounds like schizophrenia, I told you to take your medicine this morning!" Michael exclaimed. "I know, I know..." Michael was right, I should've taken them today. "Well you should get some rest, you'll need it after an incident like that..." "I'm fine..." I shrugged. "Would you just take my advice for once?" Michael asked annoyed. "Alright... fine..." I said as I lied down. "I should've taken a picture of you actually listening to me!" Michael joked, "If you need something, let me know." Michael offered. "Michael I'm fine! If I need something, I'll do it myself." "You're so stubborn..." Michael mumbled as he walked out of the room. When he left I sat back up. "I don't know what that kid expects from me... he knows I don't sleep well. Besides, I can't just sit here, I have too much work to do..." I got up and walked over to my desk and pulled out a folder. I took out some of the paperwork and started working on it. About an hour passed and I started to get a bit sleepy. I walked over to my closet and changed into more comfortable clothes and lied back down and fell asleep.
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