Broken

Part 2

After a long day of good and bad Sabrina and I got on the bus and rode in silence until she spoke. I was so mad and didn't want to talk about it anymore.

"I'm sorry Row, it's for the best anyway. We don't need to go to the dumb party." Sabrina looked at me. I could feel her eyes though I was turned towards the window.

"We're going to the party." I say turning around looking at the shocked look on her face and continue looking out the window. Sabrina didn't want anything bad to happen to her friend. I get that, she was scared. It's my life and I appreciate that she has my back but she's not the boss of me. It was time for me to stop hiding in her shadow.

I begged my Mom to let me spend the night at Sabrina's house with her cousin. That was the only time we wanted to sleep at Sabrina's house since Katy wasn't always home. Work was beginning become Katy's identity. They allowed me. My dad trusted us to not do something if we were told not to. Sabrina use to challenge that a lot as kids but she's grown up the past year.

I didn't want to lie to my parents it made me feel bad, but I like Kendall so much that it made me not care. I didn't care about the party itself all I wanted was to go to this party and see him.

To dance and have a real conversation with him. To end the night with a kiss in hope of becoming his girlfriend. I knew that was unrealistic. I was too much of a nerd, but clearly not that much of one that he wouldn't invite me to this party. A dance was doable because he did invite me after all, but I knew that a kiss and boyfriend wouldn't be on the menu. Especially with his reputation, I know Sabrina was right about that but why couldn't I at least have one fairytale night? I did have the thought of maybe I could make him fall in love with me. I showered and got into some sweats. I had time to kill before heading to Sabrina's house. I was getting really scared about all of this. I'm not use to having Friday night plans that didn't involve my couch with my best friends or my parents.

"Knock Knock." My brother said before entering my room. I looked up at him waiting to hear what he wanted. "Did I hear correctly that you were invited to Bridget's party?"

"Yeah." I said looking at my older brother's shocked face. I know I wasn't popular but come on I'm not this awful. "What's the big deal?"

"Mom and Dad aren't letting you go are they?" Jamie asked me with this weird look on his face. He never acts like this I was so surprised.

"No they aren't." I paused wondering what he was thinking. "Why?" I added.

"Those people going to that party aren't people I want my little sister hanging out with." He mentioned. Jamie was concerned too? Why is everyone acting like I'm a piece of glass today? I'm tired of the tiptoeing around me, I wasn't broken.

"It's not of your business!" I yelled at my older brother. "Can you just leave me alone?" I was really angry. "I'm not going so you don't have to worry." more and more lies but it's worth it.

"I'm sorry Rowan." He sighed. " I'll go but next time don't ask to go to a party like this make the decision on your own. You're smart enough to know what you should or shouldn't be doing."

My brother said before walking out of my room. I rolled my eyes, everyone was getting on my nerves. I'm usually not this moody but everyone needed to mind their own business. I laid on my bed watching the TV counting down the seconds until it was time to go.

"Is this good?" I asked Sabrina later in the day after arriving at her house. I was wearing a purple haze beaded cocktail dress. It wasn't sluttly but it wasn't innocent either.

"Row, You look beautiful." She smiled at me and it made things feel normal again. Sabrina was wearing a black dress with a jean jacket, her usual party attire. I wouldn't know much about that but I've helped her get ready for parties I wasn't allowed to attend.

"Are you sure you want to go?" Sabrina asked one more time hoping I change my mind.

"Positive. Can't you just be happy for me?" I asked her hoping she would lighten up and have fun. It's ironic. Sabrina always wants me to lighten up, to have more fun and now it's me that wants her to.

"I can." Sabrina sighed and sat down with me. "I'm sorry I was being a bitch." She continued and my eyes softened. I pulled her into a big hug.

"You aren't a b-word Sab." We giggled. I don't really ever curse unless I stub my toe or something. Sabrina didn't filter herself as much as me but we rarely use them to describe ourselves or others. Life is too short to be so negative is what we always thought.

"I was just concerned." She apologized to me seconds later. It wasn't a bad thing she did, I knew her intentions were to protect me. I was overreacting.

"I'm sorry too." I pulled her into my arms again. "I know you're lookin out in my best interest but I can do that myself."

"I know" Sabrina smiled at me as we pulled away and continued getting ready.

We met up with Lucas nearby and all walked to the party. It wasn't far. Lucas and Sabrina were still worried about Kendall and me. You could see it in their eyes. Sabrina chilled out more after our talk and she trusted my judgement. I was always responsible, why would now be any different? It was 8:30 pm when we arrived. Perfect timing, everyone was getting the party started. It was pretty crowded though.

"Wow Bridget has a lot of friends." Lucas said looking around the room.

"I don't think she even knows half of these people." Sabrina said staring at a group of people that were smoking pot. There was no way miss perfect would associate herself with people like that. Luckily there wasn't a bunch of drunk people, yet. We all got sodas and found a spot that was way less crowded to talk. Sabrina and Lucas were talking about Bridget's snobby rich parents.

I hardly hanged on to the conversation I was looking for Kendall. He was nowhere to be found, but it was still early. Sabrina informed me that most people don't show up to parties till 9 pm. Why was she so much cooler than me? We grew up together, we should be the same but we aren't. Lucas was a good mix between Sabrina's inner coolness and my inner nerd. He moved here from Texas when he was seven. We took him under our wings and we've all been inseparable ever since. The only thing was they were my only real friends but they both had other friends. That was always hard but for some reason they always put me first.

I watched people dance with their boyfriends and girlfriends. I wanted to be one of them, if that wasn't pathetic as it sounds. It wasn't because I wanted to be popular or cool. I wanted someone that cares for me as much as my friends do and not because we grew up together. I wanted someone to like me for who I am today and not from childhood. I wanted to fall in love and I want Kendall to be that person. He approached the three of us. I felt like I couldn't breath.

"Hi. I'm glad you could make it." He hugged me tightly. It was the longest four seconds of my life. As dramatic as I sound it was true. He pulled away and turned to my friends he quickly side hugged Sabrina and shook Lucas's hand. So polite, handsome, smart, athletic. Kendall Hess was the best kind of guy there was.