"I'm telling you America, he's bad for you!"
"Why are you even calling me?" I had been talking on the phone with England for almost twenty minutes, still utterly confused as to why he called in the first place.
"Because I want to make sure you're okay with... Him."
"Why do you think we're dating?"
"There's no reason he'd just come home with you!"
"He wanted to make sure I got back safe."
"What even happened to you?! You never explained why you vanished off the face of the Earth!"
"His sister kidnapped me as a way to make him marry her." I decided to be blunt, hanging up right after. I didn't care if he knew about us anymore, all I know is that something's wrong with him. It wasn't long before I became sad again and proceeded to cry my eyes out.
Meanwhile Russia stayed sitting on his lonely bench for quite a while, not wanting to face reality. He didn't want to go back to America just yet, fearing he would lash out and say things he didn't mean.
"I guess we're back to walking around..."
Despite it being almost eleven p.m by this point, the streets were still moving. Most of them being people who worked night shifts or long hours.
"If only one of those cars could just slam into me... Not like it would due any good." if putting a gun to his head wouldn't end his depression and loneliness, Russia assumed getting hit in the road wouldn't be different.
"I need to stop wanting to kill myself every time some fixable or temporary problem comes up..." Russia sighed, trying to erase those thoughts from his head.
"Hey you." Russia tensed at the sound of someone's rough and dry voice. He looked behind him and saw what appeared to be a homeless man standing at the entrance of the alleyway he just passed by.
"Uh... What?" "Ya got drugs?"
"Pretty straightforward but no." I sped up my walking, disturb by randomly being asked for drugs. I ended up encountering more people like this, all asking for different things..
"How does America put up with this shit?" Russia shook his head and continued walking up and down the sidewalks until he was almost on the other side of the city.
"I need to sleep somewhere..." there were motels near by, and he had enough American money to get a room suddenly for one night. He was able to, and proceeded to cry himself to sleep. The feeling of having someone sleep next to him was already missed.
Checking out of the motel early the next morning, Russia managed to get a taxi to go back to America's place. No words were exchanged luckily, so he stared out the window while thinking about the night before. America's heartbroken voice made Russia feel emotions he didn't know he had to feel. They both truly love and care about each other, but sadly some people see it that way.
- - - - - -
When he arrived, he shyly and carefully knocked on the door. It didn't open for a a minute, but when it did, Russia was greeted with tears and a tight hug.
"I'm so sorry!! I shouldn't have walked out and left you!!" America sobbed, spewing out every kind of apology there is. Russia gently pushed him off, feeling like it was his fault America was upset.
"Please... Don't say sorry. I understand that it wasn't something you wanted to hear..." there was a bit of silence before one of them spoke.
"My sisters will hate me when they figure out I don't love women..."
"Do want to go home?" America asked, not showing any particular emotion.
"I... Feel like I'm running away from my problems."
"Then you should go." he smiled while Russia stared in surprise, yet didn't resist when America led him inside and on a couch.
"But I don't want to leave you-"
"I'm coming with you if you do."
"What?! You can't be serious!" Russia was hoping that America was somehow joking, though he proceeded to explain how he didn't care about any hate he would receive. As he talked, Russia tried not to voice his disagreements, though a few slipped out. America put his hands on Russia's shoulders and glared at him, not with anger, instead with desperation and sadness.
"Please... I don't want to leave you either. If I don't go, I may never see you again... And I don't want the last time I see you to be me shutting the door as you walk away."
"So you'd rather see me dragged away by my crazed sister, who's bent on an incestuous relationship?"
"Well... No..." America looked away, pulling his hands back to himself.
"But that won't happen."
"I wish you luck then."
"Why did I say that?" both nations wanted to say something, though they kept opening their mouths and not saying anything.
Slowly, America pushed Russia on his back, coating his eyes with confusion.
"If this might be the last peaceful moment we have together, make this count then." he kissed him with sweetness that Russia didn't know was possible, melting his heart instantly. Although he pulled away, not allowing himself to be consumed with lust just yet.
"Do you want to?" America rolled his eyes at Russia's question.
"I've wanted to for almost a hundred years now. I don't really care if it feels good or not. Just the feeling of being that close to you..." he trailed off and gently glazed over Russia's neck with his nails.
"It's enough to make me happy." to follow that statement, he showed a seemingly uncontrolled smile while blushing brightly.
"I'm happy even now knowing my first time with consent gets to be with you."
"Wait... What..?!" Russia was shocked that America had remained a virgin up until he was taken by Belarus, and was angry that it had to be his real first time. nonetheless, he was now aiming to make him feel as good physically as he seemed to be emotionally.
"Y-Yeah..." he smiled again with a more embarrassed look, there were enough words said. They begun taking off their clothing, about to lose their minds just looking at each other. America shook slightly as he kissed Russia again, this time with more passion and let him take control if he wanted to.
"I'll be gentle, okay?"
"T-Thank you." America shyly said, grateful he didn't have to shamefully asked him not to be rough. With some re-positioning, America put himself on his back and Russia above him.
"I love you." "I love you too... You're my everything." Russia traced his hand along his lover's goosebump covered skin as he connected their lips again. True, Russia's not a virgin whatsoever, but it was never real love. Some could say it was even unwanted, but he pushed those dark memories out of his head and focused on the present. This was wanted, and it was love, regardless of what anyone would think.
"And I spent my whole life trying to avoid doing this... Pathetic."
"Hey Ivan..."
"Yes?"
"You have beautiful eyes."
YOU ARE READING
Rules are Rules-Hetalia RusAme
Fanfiction*some chapters are very long ;-;* Russia and America adore each other, but could never say a word. One is haunted by the thought of his people and family hating him. And the other doesn't even understand his own feelings. Although when an unfortunat...
