the world is a little blurry

020

Time passed. Eventually all the hate I felt towards her became pure numbness. I still remember her scent, her touch and how romantic she could be. But I grew up, and she did to. Life changed kinda drastically, we received an crazy amount of money since my mom was living boyfriend. My brother was born but, I moved out pretty quickly, so I lost contact with my family. My mom lived in the same neighborhood as Billie together with Joe and my brother, but I never met them again.
All the drama died down, the media forgot about "Billie Eilish's girlfriend" and I became just (Y/N).

I made new friends, started college and things were kinda fine. I still missed Billie. A lot. I tried dating but it just didn't felt right...I still watched and listened to her and apparently she was dating a guy already. It just hurt to see it. I hope she's doing okay. I mean...She looked like she was.

"You dated Billie Eilish?! Dude! You were the 'mysterious' girl?! No fucking way!" Bruno laughed and I rolled my eyes "Yeah" He sighed "Can't believed she did that to you though...All of the blue? She dumped you?" He raised an eyebrow and I nodded "Yeah, but...Ya know, we were only teenagers...It's kinda understandable" I shrugged and he finished his soda "You miss her though?" I stopped and stared at my foot "Kinda...I guess" I muttered and he rubbed my back "Aww...Can't you just text her?" I scoffed "Dude." He tilted his head and I shook mine "Nah...It was a long time ago...Bet she wanna see me" He stood up and stretched "Well...I gotta go but I still wanna see you guys meet each other again!" I rolled my eyes "Yeah right...It's not like we gonna just bump into each other! We talking about a celebrity" He whinnied "Lemme believe in it! Damn...You no fun!" I laughed and walked him to the door.

My apartment felt cold now. It was weird to live alone. Everything was so quiet...When I felt alone like that I texted Billie. Ah fuck, there she is again. Why can't I forget her already?
I ran my fingers through my hair and gave up.
All the memories flushed in.
To the surprise dates, to Pepper, to my house, to Lia...Everything changed. And I felt so overwhelmed, I just want her to be by my side. Unfortunately that was impossible. At the same time I'd love to meet her again, I was scared.
Things didn't work out the first time, why would it work now?
What the fuck am I even thinking?! I don't even know where the fuck she is.
Well...She never stopped following me on Instagr- No. I will not do that.

"Just do it already! Holy fucking shit!" Bruno exclaimed and snatched my phone from my hand texting Billie "Bruno I swear to god if you text her I will-" He looked at me with a smirk "Oops" My heart dropped. I wasn't prepared for this...I hate Bruno. Why did I tell him about Billie yesterday? Fuck...

y/n
i miss u

billieelish
oh shit
hi
damn...i miss u

(y/n)
yeah

billieeilish
so?
everything okay?
we dont talk since idk fucking 2019?

y/n
yeah something like that
im good hbu?

billieeilish
yea im good
sorry if its rushed but you wanna grab some coffee? like...tomorrow morning? i really wanna see u

y/n
sure
where?

billieeilish
same coffee shop?

y/n
sure
10am?

billieeilish
yeah
see u

y/n
see u

"Bruno!" I whinnied and he hugged me "See? Everything is okay!" I looked at him dead in the eye "You're so fucked..." He pouted playfully.
Shit i'm going to see her again.
And like always.
Things were rushed.

Time passed by slowly and it was killing me. I did and redid my hair about 18 times and changed my outfit about 4.
It was finally 10AM and I rushed outside to the oh so nostalgic place.
I sat down on a booth and waited for her.

it felt like it was the first time.
when we were 17 and at a restaurant with out parents.
her eyes met mine.

"Holy shit! (Y/n)! Hey!" We hugged and I tried my best not to cry. "Hi! Oh my god you...You look great". She smiled and we sat down.
"So? How's life?" She asked excitedly and I giggled. We talked about everything, how we were, college, Pepper, her family, her career...
"I'm so proud of you, (Y/n)..." Her smile made me melt.
"Thanks...Damn...We grew huh?" I giggled awkwardly and she nodded "Yeah...I-I'm sorry...For being a mess back then...I loved you so much and I was scared..." I nodded and smiled sadly "Dude it's fine...We had fun though, huh?" She laughed "But you feel better now, don't you?" Billie nodded "Oh yeah, I learned to love myself more and stuff" She fidgeted with her rings "I uh...I heard you gotta a boyfriend now, huh?" She laughed loudly "Noo! Oh no! I-We...It's just PR...I-I didn't...Get into any relationship after that" I bit my cheek "Yeah me neither..." There was a silence after that. Probably we were too busy thinking about the past.
"Look...Can we be friends again?" She asked nervously and I nodded instantly "Please! Yes!" She smiled widely "You busy today?" I thought for a bit. Well, I was going to visit Bruno but...I'm sure that he will say 'Go meet Billie' so...He can wait. "Nah, i'm free today" She stood up "Come on, Finneas, my mom...They all miss you!" I stood up to and we went to her car.

Billie opened the door and called Finneas. He came lazily and looked at Billie kinda pissed "What is it?!" I poked my head out of the door frame and his face dropped "(Y/n)!? Oh my god! Hi!" We hugged tightly and Pepper came running immediately attacking me with licks, Maggie came to the door "(Y/n), honey!" She hugged me too as well as Patrick. I missed them so much. Billie stood there smiling like an idiot and she showed me her room.
It was almost the same, some posters were substituted with her own face and there wasn't a single part of the walls that was free from scribbles.
I traces her handwriting with my fingers and felt her eyes on me. Out of the blue she hugged me "I missed you so much...I lost the love of my life cause I was stupid" She mumbled with her lips pressed on my shoulder" I ran my fingers through her hair and kissed her forehead "I missed you too...I guess we were...Too young" She looked up at me "We were both kinda stupid" I giggled and her eyes shifted to my lips.
I took a deep breath in and placed my hand behind her neck connecting our lips.

It felt so right.

Billie's POV

I'm not afraid anymore.
I love her.
And this feels so...So right.

A/N: YO I WAS THINKING BOUT CREATING A GROUP CHAT ON IDK INSTA OR SMTH YOU GUYS DOWN??
btw...the book isn't over guys lmao