What if? An anthology

Fear Him

I always wondered what would've happened if I hadn't wrote against him. What would have happened? That is the question that is rolling in my mind, what if I had never let you go, would you be the man I loved and you would've loved me back? So many roads taken, joyous or heartbroken. If I had stayed, would you have tried but I guess will never know the truth of the many twists and turns, including the roundabouts. I had to draw the line we had to go down the right path. I still love you regardless of the road will go down. I guess will never really know. 
Should we go back to the start?

Verse 1

I was standing there in shock, Elaine told me what happened to her. I couldn't believe it, I wanted to cry for her and yet I was standing here. She told me not to do anything she wouldn't do, I didn't really know what that meant but I just went back to my day as normal. Trying hard not to think about what had happened yet I was, I was so heartbroken.
It was later on, I was on my break and Patrick came in.

"Are you all right?"
"Not really, I know something I shouldn't be saying anything really. I'm mad at Andy."
"I thought you two were friends."
"I mean we are friendly but I wouldn't say we were friends."
"Oh I didn't realise."

So I just started to do my mids on my break, I shouldn't really but they needed to be done. I went into the ladies changing rooms and then the men's. I just stood in there for a few moments and left. I sat down on the sofa to eat my food feeling sad and hurt by everything that had happened that week. I was going to have to tell someone about this, I trusted Gemma I could tell her I don't think I would've been able to Katie she was too blunt for my liking. Due to what she told me earlier that week, telling me that I was paranoid. I didn't like that, telling me I was paranoid over what I thought that Andy could have feelings for me. I had to tell her, I was going to quit so she told me he had a girlfriend.
So I stayed.

****

It was Friday, I was feeling hopeless and sad when Elaine and Gemma came in.

"Are you all right Elle?" Elaine asked me.
"I'm ok, I guess."
"You didn't do anything rash."
"No, of cause I didn't. Why would I?" I asked smiling. She hugged me, Andy walked past us and I sighed quite loudly.
"Elle, what's wrong?"
"Nothing, nothing at all." I looked at Elaine for comfort. She touched my arm in support, that everything was going to be all right. I knew that everyone would find out eventually what happened but I couldn't help but think I had a secret. There were so many secrets that I didn't know what to do, I felt like I was going to have a breakdown so I just walked away trying hard not to cry. I wound up in the staff room crying my eyes out, I heard the door click for then to wipe the tears away.
It was Andy.

"I knew something was wrong, what is it?"
"I don't know how to say it, I've had such a rough week."
"Everyone does sometimes, what happened?"

I told him everything, to Jay telling me he was going to sue the company. I even told him that i knew he had a girlfriend, that I had feelings for him. I just didn't know what to do because he had a girlfriend and I knew that I wanted to quit because I had feelings for him. He just looked at me while I was crying my eyes out.

"I just want us to have a professional relationship is that all possible."
"Yes we can. I promise none of this will affect us."
"Do you promise?"
"I promise."

I looked at him with tears with my eyes, that I noticed there was a glint in his eye. I shouldn't do it regarding how I felt so I closed my eyes and slightly sniffed. I felt his breath on my lips and he put his hand on the back of my neck, I fluttered my eyelids open and he pulled me in.

"So I was thinking." Someone said opening the door. Andy sprung up from the sofa leaving me in suspense and I looked at him.
"I hope you get better soon." Andy said, Abby walked in with Charlie and he left me.