PRIMROSE [H.S]

eight

That beginning of the school year had been different from the rest. We had the habit, the day before we start, to gather all together at Florence's and do a marathon of Love Island, we keep the last episodes to watch them together. But that year it was not like that.

I had just arrived from Chicago, after spending the whole summer in the United States, with Harry and the rest of the boys, it had been the two most intense months of my life. I hadn't seen my parents, nor my friends too much; in fact, I felt guilty because I didn't even know who was in Love Island that year; I could imagine them in my head talking about everything that happened in the reality while I just listened. An evil little voice rang in my head. "Maybe this summer was way too much Lacie, you haven't set foot in London all summer. I'm sure they will be furious with you".

But I was wrong, they simply asked me about all the things we had done, the places we had visited, and check photographic evidence that everything I had lived had been real. Greece had been fine, but nothing compared to all of the above. After all, everything was the same as before the summer began. So much the same, that after a month, it seemed that it had been a summer dream; of those long one, which make you wake up in a good mood, but nothing more than that, just a dream.

"Are you alright?" Charlotte asked as I put my laptop in my bag. We had to finish a project on Economics in the Victorian era that same night, so we had spent all afternoon doing it at home.

I nodded, after a month back to reality, it was all too weird again. University, timetables, sleeping alone.

"I know it's not like that, don't lie to me."

2I haven't seen Harry for three weeks. We don't talk too much due the time difference. It's just being harder adapting to my life here. That's it, nothing more" I lied. It was much more than that. I had become being used to live with him, that fast and pressureless lifestyle; only us. It didn't matter where we were, because we were together.

"It's because of the pictures, isn't it?" she was right. I had been feeling miserable for days whenever I read news about him. But the pictures with Kendall on the yacht had completely destroyed me, I didn't want to recognize it but it was like that.

"He didn't even tell me, that's what bothers me. I feel like a complete fool, just one more on his list."

"Laz, he probably forgot to tell you about it; you know they have a lot of work, this tour is smashing it. That's bullocks, they're just friends; being famous it's inevitable to meet other celebrities."

"I have lived the best summer of my life, and I think that it hasn't meant anything to him" my eyes filled with tears immediately and Charlotte threw herself into my arms. "I can't even think straight."

"I'm going to make you a cup of tea and we talk more calmly."

She appeared with two Earl Grey, and some Scottish butter cookies, my favourites.

"I'm sorry to be this hard on you honey, but you already knew what it meant to be with him" she said with a look of compassion.

"I did know, I knew that all this would happen, what I didn't believe was that it would affect me the way it does. In my mind everything was perfect: I would go back to university, and he would be in London with me at the end of the tour. He told me he would do it" my voice faded like a sigh. " I haven't known anything about him for three days."

"Lacie, I think you're just afraid. Afraid to fall in love with him, and being too late to stop all of this."

Her words sounded like bullets going through my whole body. I wanted to stop my tears from falling, but I wasn't able again. I just wanted everything to be a dream, and return to my normal life. Close my eyes and appear with him again in Los Angeles, or maybe in my room in Manchester. I didn't even know what I wanted, just stop feeling this way.