Kit and Tully | Love or Music?

12 - Best Friends Forever?

For a moment we all look at each other. Tully fumbles uncertainly with the case of his guitar. The undercurrent of tension is palpable. It's clear none of the band want to play, and without music, the flowers and picnic seem pointless. The night started out wrong. It was never going to be a success.

"This is bullshit!" Mac spits on the mound, quiet as a grave in the dark. "Why are we even here? This is no place for a party, let's head back to the house."

"Did you believe we could do it?" Tully asks me on the way down.

"Wake Aonghus?" It seems ludicrous now, yet I did half-believe it, but I'm not going to admit that to Tully, so I say nothing.

"It's nice to think there is something out there that can fix all your problems," he says then, "but it's bullshit."

"Yeah." It sums up the overall mood. Everything is bullshit.

"Kit!" His voice is soft in the moonlight and, for once, the tender look in his eye doesn't make me turn away.

"What?" It's meant to be a whisper but comes out harshly, a rasp in the soft night air.

"Nothing." Tully shakes his head and moves away from me, into the darkness, head down, shoulders hunched.

I almost call him back. Unlike Mac, who never paid me any attention, Tully has eyes only for me. It's like he believes he can save me from myself. Perhaps part of me even wants to agree.

He can be the one who saves me from myself.

My eyes have suddenly been opened to the truth.

"Shit."

"What?" Spike pulls at my sleeve.

"Nothing." I shove him off.

"Hey, what's up with Tully?"

I shrug. "How would I know?"

We return to the house defeated. At one point, everyone was going to stay over for a party, but instead of lightening, the mood has only grown darker.

With a sense of anticlimax, Felice, Spike and I watch the band climb into the van. Gravel crunches under the wheels as they accelerate down the avenue in a cloud of dust.

"I should go too," Tully says.

"You can stay over, if you want," Felice offers.

Tully shakes his head and walks to his mother's car. "Thanks anyway."

"What's got into him?" Felice eyes me. "Len wouldn't stay either. We must have lost our touch, eh?" The words are light but she's scowling as she speaks.

I watch Tully's car disappear into the darkness and it feels like part of me is leaving with it.

How could I have been so blind?

Now that I've finally learned to appreciate him, I've lost him.

"Why wouldn't Len stay?" Spike asks.

"Too much shit going on with the band." Felice shrugs but her scowl deepens as she turns away and heads inside.

We follow her up the steps.

Neither of us say a word. We know her too well.

She's furious because Len picked the band over her. He's not as smitten as she thought.

Or maybe she likes him more than she's been letting on.

I turn to Spike and the knowing look on his face confirms my unspoken insight.