Ready Player: START (Parzival x Reader)

It's an Arms Race

"Z, I can't believe you told her about Kira." Aech scolded Parzival as he got ready for his date. You were sitting sullenly in the corner, wishing that looks could kill and you could kill a certain pink-haired person.

"What?" he asked in annoyance and turned away from the mirror to look at Aech, "I told you." He fully turned around, "hey, what about this?" he waved a hand over his head and changed into a ridiculous brown and white get up topped with a white scarf that went down to his knees.

"No. Have you considered that Art3mis could be using you?" Aech questioned and got up from his reclined position on the sofa.

"Hey, dude, she's giving me a clue." He turned away from the mirror, "should I go more," he waved his hand again and changed into a red suit with crazy shoulder pads, "thriller?"

"No!" you called from your seat and Aech pointed at you in agreeance.

"Punk?" his silver hair changed into a pink, spiky mohawk and you stifled your urge to throw up.

"No." Aech voiced.

"Duran Duran."

"No."

"Does it look like I'm trying too hard?" he questioned.

"Yes!" both you and Aech shouted.

"Listen to yourself!" Aech lectured and walked up to Parzival, "you have a massive cyber crush on this girl. She's hacking your heart, to get to your head." Aech pointed at his own head for emphasis.

"I got it!" Parzival spun around and changed outfits again.

"Buckaroo Banzai?" you questioned from your position on the couch, "I mean, at least you kept your hair."

"Yeah!" Parzival smiled excitedly.

"Really?" Aech didn't seem impressed, "you're gonna wear the outfit from your favorite movie? Don't be that guy."

Parzival looked at himself in the mirror and straightened his outfit, "I am that guy."

"Z," Aech stood up to walk over to Parzival, "you gotta be more careful about who you meet in the OASIS."

"Aech," Parzival disagreed and looked up, "Art3mis gets me. She'll get my outfit. There's just...this connection. I mean," he laughed, "sometimes, we even..."

"Finish each other's sentences?" Aech questioned with annoyance.

"Yeah!" Parzival responded excitedly.

"We have that!" Aech exclaimed, "me, and you, and (g/l)!"

"I'm more concerned about how many other times you've met her," you frowned and crossed your arms, the two guys in the room turned to look at you, "without telling us, because you have never finished each other's sentences."

"Stop being salty (g/l)." Parzival gave you a wave and left you gaping at him in disbelief, "besides," he turned back to Aech, "I know we finish each other's sentences, but that's because we're best friends, dude!"

You rolled your eyes and Aech continued to scold Parzival, "she could be a dude, too, dude." Aech responded scathingly.

"Come on!" Parzival rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"I'm serious!" Aech began to pace around, "she could actually be a 300-pound dude who lives in his mama's basement in suburban Detroit."

"And her name is Chuck!" you shouted from the couch and Aech nodded in agreeance.

"Think about that."

Parzival narrowed his eyes at the both of you, "look, you guys are just jealous because I managed to score a date."

"No!" you and Aech shouted in response.

"Stop raining on my parade and let me do what I want." He responded coldly before stomping out of the room.

"You! Agh!" you groaned in frustration and leapt up from the couch. "Oh, Art3mis this, Art3mis that. Why are you so blind!" you shouted at the closed door, hoping he'd hear it, but knowing he probably already teleported away. "You have two best friends right here who have been gunting with you since forever! And you're just going to leave us in the dust for the first girl who talks to you?" you angrily kicked the side of the couch and immediately recoiled and held your foot. You blinked away tears of pain, "can you break toes in the OASIS?"