Only A Year

Chapter 7

AN: THIS CHAPTER IS SO SO JUICY SO ENJOY AMD PLEASE VOTE AND COMMENT!!!!!!:-*

It's been three weeks since my first day of school, and Harry and I have been getting closer he's been like a brother to me. Although Tanner has been begging me for forgiveness, we'll that is not happening I'm not a very forgiving person.
But somehow my mind wanders to Harry. So far he has been my best friend here. He is also the only one that I trust here because of my past I have trust issues.But I can honestly say he is the most important person in my life right now. He is also really funny he's always making me laugh and putting a smile on my face.He has even given me a nickname and thanks to him everyone calls me it, Nelly. I also start to notice more and more guys have been asking me out obviously I say no because I just don't want to. Although hell rises when Harry finds it he gets so mad and confrontes the guy which me leading to him not fighting him. However he is my best friend so I have to help him not get in trouble.
But right now I'm at the park with Harry on the swings. We've been here for over two hours now just talking about random stuff and I've gotten to know him so much better. I know he got bullied when he was a little kid because he was overweight. They would call him 'puffball' and 'Jupiter'. Then in sixth grade is when he decided to loose weight and that's when he got popular. More and more girls would flirt with him but he would reject them because they wouldn't flirt with him when he was 'fat' so why did they decide to now?
He also tells me about how he was born in Holmes chapel and he moved here when he was a baby. He lives with his mom and sister Gemma.
"What about your dad?
Where is he at?" I ask him.
Almost immeidtly his face turned red and his grip on the swing was hard. He didn't answer me, we were silent for a few minuets. But I finally decided to break the silence.
"You don't have to tell me, I was just curious."
" I'd rather not talk about it it's not that I don't trust you I'm just not really comfortable with that specific subject" he says playing with his hands. A thing he does when he's nervous or uncomfortable.
"That's fine but I should really get going" I state standing up.
" Okay I'll walk you"
"No you should get home it's already 6".
"Nah.its all good they won't worry" he states.
"Okay"
He grabs my hand in a friendly gesture and I smile at him. We've been walking for at least twenty minutes now and it been all silence. I don't know what's wrong with him usually we would have made great conversation but I don't want to push him right now. We finally arrive at my apartment. I turn around I look at him.
"Um thanks for uh for walking me" I say awkwardly.
"Your welcome nelly" he says giving me a small smile .
I unlock the door and right before I was about to close the door he stops me. Something happened something that's doing to change my whole world.
He grabs my face an kisses me Immediately sparks fly everywhere and I can feel my face heat up. His lips are so soft and so irresistible. Before my brain can think what I'm doing my hand goes around his neck and I kiss him back. He wraps his hands around my waist.
Omg this is my first kiss. Who am I kidding? This is the first time a boy has even touched me. Before I'm ready he pulls apart so we can breathe.
He puts his forehead on mine and closes his eyes.
"I've been wanting to do that since I first saw you" he says breathless.
I don't say anything. I don't know what to say. So I don't. Before I can even think he walks away and is gone My heart breaks when I see him punch a wall and cry out in pain and slide down the wall. I rush to go see if he's okay.
"Are you okay" I say with worry clear on my voice.
"No why can't you see, you don't see anything I've been giving you signs that I-" but before he can finish he gets up and walk away.
"Harry wait" I shout at him.
But he's already gone. I groan and stomp up to my apartment. I open the door and go to my room and scream as loud as I can. I throw my body on my bed and put on music that's what I need. Why did Harry punch a wall? What was he going to say? More importantly why did he kiss me? Why did I like it? I mean who ami kidding why would some one as gorgeous as Harry want someone as ugly and fat as I am. He could literally have any girl he wants yet he chooses me. This is all so frustrating.
I'm in pain so much pain my pass still haunts me and put me in pain everyday. So I do what the only thing I can do.
I grabe the pocket knife off my uncles dresses lock my self in the bathroom. Grab my phone from my back pocket and put on ' flightless bird' it's the only song I listen to on repeat while doing this.
I grab the pocket knife turn my right arm around and dig the knife as deep as I can and let out shriek but then quickly changes into a sigh of relief.
And I do this until I can finally see blood dripping on all of my arm.