Dream Adoption! (Shaytards Adoption Story)

Chapter 57- Too Soon?

update today cuz i'll be busy on tuesday

-

 

Previously:

On the bright side, Mom let Kaiden come over for a little while afterwards. We were in my bedroom, eating some candy and watching Connor Franta, when I said it.

"I love you."

-

I watched as Kaiden's face tensed, blinking a few times. "I-I'm gonna go." He said and rushed out.

God, I screwed up.

I knew it was too soon, I just knew it. Now my boyfriend probably hates me, and God I screwed up bad.

Needless to say, I sat in my room and cried for a bit.

Okay, an hour. Or at least until Mom came up and knocked softly on the door. "Ryan? Can I come in?" Her voice was soft, cautious even.

I mumbled a 'yes', and Mom was on the floor next to me within seconds. "Spill. I saw him leave."

"I ruined it, Mom! I ruined our relationship!" I could feel myself start to cry, but I willed the tears away.

"What did you say to him that could've ruined it."

"Told him I loved him." I mumbled. I really screwed up.

"Honey, that's not as bad as it sounds. Maybe he just needed time to think-"

I cut Mom off. "No, Mom. You don't get what happened. I should've known not to date another person, I knew it would end up badly. Why am I so stupid? I-"

"Honey." Mom cut me off again. "You're not stupid. And I'm sure he had a reason to leave. Now, tell me exactly what happened."

So I did. I told her how we were watching Connor Franta videos, and how we were cuddling, and how I said it. I told her how his face was so surprised, and how he left.

Everything.

"He'll come around, Ry." Mom rubbed circles on my back. "It'll be okay."

"What if I ruined it?" I asked, looking up at her with wet eyes. "What if he doesn't love me too?"

"Give it time." Mom shrugged. "You'll see him at school, maybe he'll say something. And besides, I see him look at you like you're the center of the world. I swear, he's always got heart eyes."

The last part made me a little happier, and I giggled.

I just have to give him time.

-

Being myself, the next morning I had to make a video, because it always seems to be right to sing about how I felt, and it made me happier in general.

And, in celebration of Four, I wanted to sing Ready to Run.

"So hey guys." I said to the camera. "How was your Halloween? Mine was... interesting." I said, trying not to think about last night. "So I'm here to sing a song by One Direction, because I feel like I haven't in a while. So, um, here's Ready to Run."

I grabbed my guitar, strumming the intro.

 "There's a lightning in your eyes, I can't deny
Then there's me inside a sinking boat running out of time
Without you I'll never make it out alive
But I know, yes I know I'll be alright

 There's a devil in your smile it's chasing me
And every time I turn around it's only gaining speed
There's a moment when you finally realize
There's no way you can change the rolling time
But I know, yes I know I'll be fine

 This time I'm ready to run
Escape from the city and follow the sun
Cause I wanna be yours, don't you wanna be mine?
I don't wanna get lost in the dark of the night
This time I'm ready to run
Wherever you are is the place I belong
Cause I wanna be free, and I wanna be loved
I will never look back now I'm ready to run
I'm ready to run

 There's a future in my life I can't foresee
But less of course I stay on course to keep you next to me

 There will always be the kind to criticize
But I know, yes I know I'll be alright

 This time I'm ready to run
Escape from the city and follow the sun
Cause I wanna be yours, don't you wanna be mine?
I don't wanna get lost in the dark of the night
This time I'm ready to run
Wherever you are is the place I belong
Cause I wanna be free, and I wanna be loved
I will never look back now I'm ready to run

 This time I'm ready to run
I keep everything that I got from your love

 This time I'm ready to run
Escape from the city and follow the sun

 Cause I wanna be yours, don't you wanna be mine?
I don't wanna get lost in the dark of the night
This time I'm ready to run
Wherever you are is the place I belong
Cause I wanna be free, and I wanna be loved
I will never look back now I'm ready to run
I'm ready to run."

-

In Biology on Monday, I could barely focus, because next block was lunch, and lunch was where I saw Kaiden.

"Dude, you okay?" Taryn poked my shoulder. We were working together on a microscope lab, and my mind kept drifting to Kaiden-Land. "You're supposed to put it into high power."

"Oh, sorry." I chuckled nervously, switching the objective on the microscope to high power. "I'm a little off today, that's all."

"A little? Ryan, you've barely caught anything the teacher's said." Taryn rose an eyebrow. "Seriously, what's up?"

"Nothing." I mumbled, going back to my lab paper.

"You sure?"

"Um, y-yeah." I nodded, filling in a few answers. "Just got a lot on my mind."

"Like what?"

"Boyfriend stuff, don't worry about it." I shook it off. "It's alright."

"Whatever you say." She sang, and we went back to work.

-

When lunch came around, to say I was nervous would be a big understatement.

I was terrified.

I nervously walked to out normal table, sitting down and took out the lunch Mom had packed.

Kaiden releuctantly sat down across from me, but we didn't say anthing.

"Jesus, is this a game of couples silence or something?" Harper banged her fist on the table, looking at us. I didn't know she was there at all.

I sheepishly looked up from my lunch and looked to Kaiden, his eyes wide from Harper's outburst.

He still looked perfect, though.

"Harp, can you leave us alone for a second?" I asked my friend, and she left slowly, backing away towards the vending machine. "Um, hi."

"Hey." He greeted back. "Look, about Friday nigh-"

"What happened? Why'd you leave? It took so long for me to gain the courage to say it, and then you just left, Kaiden. That hurt."

"Look, I'm sorry, it was surprising." Kaiden said, and I only grew more annoyed. I don't know why I was suddenly so annoyed, but I was, and I didn't want to hear a thing he had to say.

But I still loved him.

-

Four is amazing af