Hidden Desires

In my arms

I have been holding him for hours, and I know I shouldn't be here. My arms wrapped tightly around Namjoon, my sisters' boyfriend. Lilah, my sister, is 15 months older than me and is currently out with the guy she has been seeing behind his back for months. Namjoon showed up at the door as I was hopping around the kitchen, making a bowl of ice cream before going to bed.

I heard a knock at the back door. Opening the door, Joonie, as we called him, flew straight into my arms sobbing. In total disdain for my sister, I wrapped my arms around him, attempting to console him for what I thought was my sister's transgressions. Through tears, Joonie looks up at me and says, "Y/N, they're gone."

I drop down to my knees and try to make sense of who is gone. Pushing his head further into my chest I place my hand under his chin and lift it to see his puffy eyes

As he wipes his hand across them and says, my parents had an accident. I grab his hand and pull him to his feet, leading him towards the stairs to the family room in the basement.

Namjoon collapsed on the sofa and began to tell me about the events of the past week that led him here. "The police came to my house and asked if I was the son of Mr. and Mrs. Kim and that they had a terrible crash. My father died on impact, and my mother passed on the way to the hospital. What am I going to do Y/N? My grandparents are flying here from Korea, but I can't stay there, I can't stay there another night by myself". I sat down next to him and took his hand in mine,

"Joonie, you're always welcome to stay here, but I don't know what time Lilah will be back." Nodding his head, he looks up at me and says "y/n I know where Lilah is and who she is with. I don't want to discuss it, and I don't want you to have to cover for her anymore, I have known you too long and can see in your face that you knew and are disgusted with it". Feeling a wave of relief that I wouldn't have to explain to my friend why Lilah is such a messy bitch, I feel his hand on my knee with his thumb gently rubbing back and forth.

"Y/N don't concern yourself if I'm hurt or not cause I'm not. I just kept coming over, always expecting that Lilah would blow me off and leave me here to hang out with you. Over the past couple of months, I spent more time with you than I have with her. I have always cared about both of you, but My heart has always only belonged to you."