You safe me

Chapter 3 - Silence

Bucky sits at the kitchen counter. He has bread, butter and some other things in front of him but makes no move to actually get something done. He's hungry but he has no energy to do something against it. Lunch and dinner went similar, yesterday. He sat silently at the table with everybody else, didn't ate and didn't talked. Steve shared him concerned glances all the time and tried more than once to get him to talk, to eat or to do something at all. But Bucky didn't. He sat there, stared at his plate and said nothing. Even Tony and Sam shared concerned glances at him. He was barely himself. They know him silent, yes, but he always took care of himself, ate, drank and talked at least to Steve. But now. Now he is a shadow. And empty shell. And he feels like one. Whatever this cat had done to him, now that she's gone, she feels like she took all the joy with him that he had. He can't really explain it himself but he doesn't feel the need or comfort or whatever to speak or do anything.

He hears steps behind him and he immediately knows that it's Steve but he doesn't turn around. He keeps staring at his plate and the bread. He hears Steve sigh and he knows that he looked at the small plate with chicken on it that he had set out for Y/N, even when he knows that she's not coming to eat. It became a habit. The night hadn't let him not forget that. He slept worse than in a while. He had a nightmare which he hadn't since Y/N was with him or more precisely since he fed her and it had shaken him up pretty badly. He wasn't able to fall back asleep, so he's awake since two in the morning now.

Bucky looks at the small plate, too, and feels his heart sink even more, if possible.

He misses her even when she was only a few days with him. The stool beside him gets pulled away a bit and Steve sits down, clapping one hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Buck." He says nothing and just shrugs. She chose to leave after all. What else can he do to get her to stay as to ask her? Steve sighs again and looks at Bucky's breakfast. "Did you eat anything yet?" Bucky stays quiet. "You know, I miss her too. I got used to her sneaking up on me." No reaction. Steve sighs again. "I worry, Buck. You didn't speak since she left. You barely ate." The brunette feels his friends' eyes on him. "Please, don't fall back to your old habits. Talk to me at least." But Bucky doesn't. He doesn't know what to talk about. His head is full with things and at the same time it's empty. Nothing seems important and yet everything is. The blonde soldier stands back up with another sigh and turns to leave. "Don't forget to take care of yourself, Buck. Please." Bucky listens silently as Steve leaves the room again. He manages to get one bread done and eats it before he puts everything back again. At a loss he stands in the common room and looks around. Here lies a mouse, there a laser pointer. Memories at Y/N. The mysterious cat. And woman?

He heaves a heavy breath and leaves the room. Helpless he looks down the hall, not knowing what he should do. He avoids going to his room. It reminds him too much of the cat- no, woman- who lived with him for a few days. He's still curious why she hadn't said anything, explained herself or why she even stayed with him. But she was beautiful. Her eyes, her hair. Everything seemed beautiful on her. He would like to meet her again, not only to ask her why she could change into a cat and why she left but to see her face again.

He walks down the hall to the gym. Bucky doesn't really feel like doing anything but it is better to walk down there and watch Nat and Clint or whoever might be there train than to walk around the tower without really knowing what he should do. The doors slide open and he is instantly met with moans and groans and other sounds of sparring that he knows. He watches as Nat kicks her foot at Clint's chest but he's quick to dodge it and holds her foot still. But Nat reacts quickly and jumps up and throws her other foot at his chest and sends them both to the ground. Clint grunts and stays down, his chest heaving fast. Nat stands back up and looks at him with a smirk. "Tired already?"

"You wish." He breathes and takes in a heavy breath. "Just- Just need to-" He gestures with his hands and lets his head fall back down. His eyes register the movement on the door and he looks over. "Wow, hey Barnes!"