A Leap Into Life || m.clifford || book #1

Chapter 7: When You Are Ready

Soon after our walk in the park, it started raining, which was completely odd for this time of the year. I was about to turn into an ice sickle and Michael was shivering like a fool.

"Come on." he says grabbing my hand. He pulls me along until we were under a shelter from the rain.

"God its cold." I mumble as my teeth chatters. He hadn't dropped my hand, even though we are now away from the rain.

"It looks like its lighten up. The shop and my car isn't far from here," he tells me. I nod rubbing my hands together.

"So Clifford, I know nothing about you and you know so much about me. So do you have any siblings?"

"Only child."

"Lucky," I tell him "I have 3 siblings."

"Ashton's your older brother, right?" he questions. I nod slightly.

"I'm the mistake. He's the perfect one." I tell him, "Anyway, whats your favorite color?"

"Purple. And how are you the mistake?" he asks shaking his head.

" Because Lauren, Ashton and Harry are all innocent and I'm the screw up. My mum doesn't even talk to me most of time." I tell him. "There for I'm the mistake child."

"You weren't a mistake, Kasey. Your family cares about you." he counters,

"Maybe but they don't know how to show it."

"Kasey, I'm sorry." he says smiling sadly at me.

"Its whatever really, I can handle myself. I've gotten this far."

"I do like a girl who can take care of herself."

"Then I'm your girl." I tell him meeting his glance. He smiles.

"Hey the rain stopped." Michael tells me.

"Race ya?" I question. He grins.

"You're on Irwin." He says taking off down the sidewalk. I laugh before following after him. He beats me to the car. I catch up with him only to near 'bout kill myself by falling. Michael grabs my waist pulling me to him. We were only inches away here each other. "You sure are clumsy Miss Irwin." he whispers. I am sure he was going to kiss me, but he doesn't.

"I can't ." he murmurs. I exhale a breath I had no idea I was even holding.

"You cant what?" I question

"I want to kiss you. Goddammit Kasey you don't know how much I want to. But I cant."

"What's stopping you?" I ask

"You aren't ready Kasey. I will kiss you when you are ready." he answers. I gap at him for a few seconds before stepping away from him.

"I'm going to walk." I tell him turning around.

"Kasey," he says "Get in the car, I will drive you home." I do as he says. All the ride to my house we said nothing, I stared out the window and Michael stared at the road.

"I'll call you in the morning, Kasey," he tells me when I open the car door.

"Goodbye Michael." I say shutting the door. As soon as I get through the front door, my phone vibrates.

From: Mikey

I'm sorry. xx

To: Mikey

For what?

From: Mikey

you seemed angry. xx

To: Mikey

Nah, just tired.. Goodnight Mikey. xx

From: Mikey

Goodbye. Sleep tight beautiful. xx

I smile sitting down on the couch. I drift off to sleep with Michael on my mind.

My brother shakes me awake. I rub my eyes sitting up. "Yeah?" I ask yawning.

"Why are you sleeping on the couch?" he asks sitting at my feet.

"My bed is too far away." I tell him shrugging. "What time is it?"

"Twelve. Almost. I got up and noticed you weren't in your room,"

"You check on me at night?" I question raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah. Wanna make sure my little sister is alright," he responds trying to act offended but ends up laughing.

"Thanks." I say looking over at him. He looks at me confused.

"For what?" he asks

"Being here." I shrug "Checking on me.."

"That's what brothers are for." he tells me. "But I do want to talk to you about something I found in your bathroom floor.."

"What?" I question as my heart beat speeds up.

"A razor." he says. I bite my lip,

"A razor?" I say pretending to be surprised.

"Don't act dumb Kasey. I know you cut." he says ashamed "Please stop."

"Why should I stop?" I ask harshly. "Just because you tell me to stop doesn't mean I'll listen."

"Kasey you don't need to do it." He exclaims. My eyes almost pop out of my head.

"How the hell are you going to tell me. I don't need to!" I was yelling now "You know nothing Ashton."

"I do know Kasey! I have been down that road! It doesn't help."

"Yeah but you aren't me."

"All I know is if you do it again I will send you to a hospital Kasey Irwin. Don't you dare push me that far." He threatens. I stand up and ball up my fist letting out a groan.

"Do you think I care, Ashton? I won't stop until I am dead. You know it." I tell him.

"Kasey." he warns. I roll my eyes.

"Put me in a hospital Ashton. I don't give a damn, okay?" I say turning away from him. I don't stop until I walk into my room. I fall on my bed screaming into my pillow. He can put me in any hospital he'd like. I don't really give a damn. I pull my phone out of my pocket and click on Michael's contacts. I push the call button and listen to the rings. After the second ring he picks up.

"Kasey? Whats wrong?" his groggy voice fills my eyes making me feel guilty for calling him so late.

"I - uh - I just really need someone right-"

"I'll be there in twenty." he cuts me off.

"Okay." I whisper. The line goes dead. I walk to my closet grabbing my gym bag. I fill it with my normal needs and clothes for school tomorrow. I finish right when Michael pulls up outside. I walk down the stairs and passed Ashton. I open the door and walk to Michael's car.

"Kasey are you okay?" he asks. I shake my head letting the tears fall.

"I'm never okay." I tell him. He reaches across grabbing my hand.

"Kasey tells me whats going on from the beginning." he tells me. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I start from the very beginning. And I don't stop until I tell him everything.