Breaking Point ✔️| A story about Depression

🦋Chapter Fourteen🦋

".... I'm a product of grace. I've got length of days..... "
Song for the chapter: lose you to love me by Selena Gomez.
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"Well I want to die Chioma. I want to leave this world. Im tired of being a trash. I'm tired of being invisible and only visible to those who want to hurt me. I met one person, only one person who really cared about me for who I am and then I pushed him away cause I was ungrateful and wanted him to love me in a different way. But guess what?". Ashley turned fully to Chioma and that was when Chioma noticed she was crying.

"He died. He freaking died because of the hateful words I said. I told him to rot in hell and he burnt down that same day in his place of work. Isn't that murder!". Ashley's knees hit the cool morning sand as she sobbed.

"I killed the only good person in my life. Don't I deserve to die because of that?. My father killed my own mother because of some stupid standards he made about her being slim and curvy and he overdosed her, tell me am I not cursed?".

"I know Timi used you. He slept with you like he did with other girls and probably did not call or speak to you after that cause he got what he wanted but he's not a bad person". Ashley's shoulders shook as the tears streamed down her face but Chioma's face was stone cold.

"Timi did not sleep with me". Chioma breathed out. Ashley's head shot up quickly staring back at Chioma with bloodshot eyes.

"He couldn't because". Chioma twisted her fingers together.

"Ashley I'm a lesbian. All my life I've been running from the fact that I am one cause of what people will think about me. I decided to flirt around with Timi to see if I would fall for him but then nothing changed. Even when I decided to sleep with him nothing changed. He noticed and asked me about it that day and when I told him the truth, he smiled and told me. It's fine"

"He let me go Ashley. He didn't judge me. He didn't laugh at me!. He accepted me that way without forcing me".

"Tell me isn't he a good person?. He kept my secret. I'm the bad person here cause I used someone else and he died yesterday". Chioma's shoulders slumped as she spoke.

"I met him and he fell for me. I don't why boys fall for me but I don't. I decided to play along cause I didn't know how to tell him. But then even when we were dating I was seeing someone else...... a girl, Nini and she's one of the best thing that has ever happened to me. I just wish I had told Ayo before he died". Chioma cried.

"Ayo?. Is it the same Ayo we're talking about here?. Ayodeji Adeshina?". Ashley questioned and Chioma nodded while blowing her nose.

"Wait! You're the girl he was dating......... you're the Chioma?". Ashley's eyes squinted as she tried to recall the exact words Ayo said that day.

"The chioma? Yeah I guess....... "

"You used him?. Ayo freaking loved you and here you are saying you used him?. Why didn't you end things with him when you noticed you were not into the relationship?". Ashley was furious because the person right in front of her never deserved Ayo. She never deserved that pure, clean hearted soul.

"I.. I.. I was ashamed".

"Well I'm more ashamed than you are!. Who the fuck do you think you are going about testing your freaking insecurities on?. God?. Man up and come out. You used everyone and now you're acting like goody two shoes ". Ashley used her fingers for better explanation. Chioma disgusted her at the moment and she felt like slapping her.

"No. That's not what it is".

"Well that's what it looks like. Well Chioma, I hope you find someone better cause you are like everyone else. You only notice people to keep on using and hurting them and when you're done you leave them in the cold, they cry their eyes out at night and depression kicks in, anxiety consumes them. They don't feel good enough. But you know the most painful thing about this whole stupid sick cycle?"

"No one notices that you're dying. No one knows that you're breaking so you put on a wide smile and they think everything is okay. But it's fucking sickening!!! And I'm grateful Ayo didn't go through that". Ashley was screaming ontop her lungs and Chioma cried harder

"Maybe that's why he had to die". Chioma shouted shutting Ashley up.

"No. No. No!. Do not blame this on death. If I should quote you 'he chose his path' and he's gone".

"He didn't choose his path Ashley. It's destiny"

"Oh shut the fuck up!". Ashley started walking towards the main road. She needs to leave Chioma's toxic confession.

"Not everything is about you Ashley!. Everybody has their own shits too"

"Screw you". Ashley muttered as she headed further. This girl was sick!

🦋

Ashley found herself in the last place she ever thought she would her home. Y'all know that Master Kg's song 'no matter where you go, remember the road that will lead you home'? That's the feeling Ashley got right now. She couldn't leave her home behind even though her demons lives here with her.

She swung the door open and as she got in and noticed the house looked different. Like it was renovated or under going renovation. Or was she in the wrong house? The former brown leather sofas were replaced with white royal chairs. The brown curtains too were changed to white even the flower vases, and most of the family pictures were all gone.

She was about to leave when a young woman came out dressed in a beautiful floral print dress. She noticed Ashley and smiled "Hey Ash. How are you?". She reached forward and held Ashley's hands. Ashley couldn't place where she was, everything is becoming too unreal to her.

"Baby". She heard her dads voice call out sweetly as he came down the stairs. The woman replied and told him she was downstairs, then his heavy footsteps were heard and he was smiling as wide as the woman. He was at the foot of the stairs when he noticed Ashley.

"You came back". He smiled but Ashley didn't return neither his or the woman's smile.

"What's going on here?". Ashley questioned.

"Where? How?". Mr James looked around him trying to figure what Ashley was saying but he knew what she was talking about.

"Here! Now!". The older man sighed and rubbed his head. Wasn't he the man shaking here yesterday? But today he looks fresh and clean, his face was glowing and he didn't act as if he lost his son and wife. Like his daughter didn't renounce him as her father.

"Well you'll find out sooner. This is Emem". He walked over to the smiling woman and pulled her closer to him.

"We're engaged".

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Opening up like this is a moment far from my proudest ❤🦋